The handshake, a seemingly simple gesture is often done poorly and taken for granted. The handshake serves as many things. It can be a first time introduction that leaves a lasting impression. It can be a greeting between lifelong friends. It can be extended in comfort in times of sorrow. It can seal a deal at a company or on global policy. It can also show respect to both elders and to the fairer sex.

History

It's not entirely know how the handshake evolved. Speculation is that knights and warriors would extend hands and clasp forearms to show that they beared no concealed weapons. This may have involved into the modern handshake.


The 3 Essentials of a Proper Handshake

1. Stand up straight! If you are sitting down, then show some respect and stand up to shake a persons hand. It shows them that they are important to you.

2. Look the other person in the eyes. Eye contact is an integral pert of conveying the message of the handshake, whether it be one of respect, warmth, trust, or even one that says "Don't tread on me." Your eyes will reveal your feelings. They are the window to your soul.

3. Firmly shake their hand. Never put a "dead fish" out there for someone to shake nor should you try to squeeze as hard as you can. Putting out a floppy hand ( a "dead fish") shows several things including lack of respect for the person on the receiving end, as well as weakness on your part. I've never been able to respect a man that has the ability to offer a firm handshake but doesn't.

Alternate Situations and Additions



Shaking a ladies hand - In business situations it is considered respectful to follow the guidelines above. In a social situation, I find it appropriate to turn their hand up to a 45 degree angle, almost as if you were going to kiss their hand as in days of old, but not quite. This show's that you respect them but that you also respect their femininity.

To put someone at ease or to make them feel comfortable, you may place your other hand briefly on their shoulder while shaking their hand. If you are shaking hands with an old friend or want to convey how truly good it is to see someone again you may opt for clasping with both hands.

In conclusion

Please pass this on. If you are already a master of the handshake, teach someone that needs to learn. You will be helping them tremendously in life. I had breakfast with an old family friend and college professor of mine the other day and he recalled the time that my grandfather had taken the time to teach him the art of the proper handshake. That was over 50 years ago and he still considers it one of the most important lessons he ever learned in life.

Views: 110

Comment

You need to be a member of Art of Manliness to add comments!

Join Art of Manliness

Comment by Dylan Pine on November 10, 2009 at 11:45am
Great article - it really does make a difference. Especially here in the South. Thanks for the welcome as well!

Latest Activity

Dave P replied to Steve M's discussion Equitable Restrooms: are Men losing their urinals?
"Trough urinals are not that uncommon in small parks in the rural areas in the Midwest. I have been to bars where the trough was in the middle of the men's room and no dividers to be seen. I have also been to public men's rooms in Europe…"
25 minutes ago
David R. replied to Steve M's discussion Equitable Restrooms: are Men losing their urinals?
"The last time I saw a trough urinal was at the Maryland State Fair Grounds.  (I guess they wanted to keep things "original" or something.)"
1 hour ago
Pale Horse replied to Steve M's discussion Equitable Restrooms: are Men losing their urinals?
"+1 I don't know anyone with a urinal at home."
3 hours ago
certified male replied to Braeden P.D.'s discussion Post-Mortem Symposium
"William T Sherman Samuel Johnson Ulysses Grant C S Lewis Calvin Coolidge My Dad"
5 hours ago
Nick H replied to Steve M's discussion Equitable Restrooms: are Men losing their urinals?
"Not sure who will be more upset with the gender neutral washrooms. Men, who've lost their private urinals, or women who lost their private mirrors. Ever go in the girls washroom in school. I did once after they won a big game and we carried…"
5 hours ago
certified male replied to M Cahill's discussion Question: adjusting evenness of double-sided razor
"Is it a slant razor?  If not, it should adjust evenly automatically. Did you happen to drop it?"
5 hours ago
Liam Strain replied to Sir's discussion US Presidential primaries in the group The Great Debate
"Find it difficult, is VERY different than "impacts job measurably" much less "hard to keep a job." These are perception/opinion statistics. Not impact statistics."
5 hours ago
Liam Strain replied to Steve M's discussion Equitable Restrooms: are Men losing their urinals?
"You can stand at a toilet, you know. "
5 hours ago

© 2016   Created by Brett McKay.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service