I'm not very good at making posts on any website, but I figured this would be the place to really put this out there. I'm hoping to gain some wisdom and possibly some confidence...My name is Victor,…Continue
"About your edit...
"I would never tell a child that their mommy can't be their mommy, ever. Reason, they'll believe that it was something about them that made mommy not want to be their mommy, kids do this all the time. They blame…"
"Maybe I'm giving her too much credit, but I expect it's just a matter of time before she realizes what it is she's done. And when she does, she's going to want those kids back. I hope he gets his paperwork squared away quickly."
"That's not a bad way to put it. My concern is that the children would blame themselves for mommy not wanting to live with them. But that may be more of a concern for the five year old, whereas the two year old would know mommy was gone but…"
"One of my neighbors is going through something similar, with similarly young children. He told the younger one that...Mommy decided she didn't want to live with us, anymore.
Obviously I am not privy to the rest of the conversation,…"
"I agree that it's not a good idea to bad mouth their mother at this point. After all, the kids are two and five. But about the truth. The truth is too harsh. Do you mean a version of the truth? Maybe something like, "your mommy can't…"
"As of this morning, I am officially on my own. My children are with me, and we have the full support of friends and family. My wife has spoken to my lawyer and has offered to sign over custodial rights to me. She feels the children are holding her…"
"Sounds like you've been given and accepted the best advice already. I just want to add that you don't need to question your manliness. You've shown yourself to be a good man in every stage of this. Keep the faith,…"
"What everyone else said. We're all behind you sir. Hang in there. And don't feel that wanting to trust the person you're married to makes you unmanly. What you're doing and having to go through is the epitome of the hell that is…"
"I'm going to echo what everyone else has said because I think it is important.
1. Get a lawyer
2. Get a divorce
3. Get the kids
You don't need me to tell you that your life with her is only miserable. You need to do what is best for you…"
"No long conversations. Definitely talk with lawyers first, as many as you can as was suggested. I echo what Will said, she will likely have an awesome sob story that implicates you for whatever she can dream up. My mom made these types of threats…"
"For me it is simple, i slowly descent into madness, while trying to change it. I also try to spin it in a way that it is just another challenge. If i can manage to get things done in such bureaucratic mess, i will be able to move mountains.
"If you don't believe in the mission or the plan, the workable options are to change it, swim against it, or go elsewhere. Or, like some have said, you can simply suffer it ... though I don't find that a terribly palatable…"
"Commiserating tends to make things worse, not better. Probably better to avoid those people like the plague. Better yet if the place were functional enough to fire them. Too many businesses are held hostage by talented employees…"
"Sometimes learning the why something is done helps. Assuming the answer is not because we always did it this way.
Remembering to put it in its place, you are not the work you do.
Taking a walk when you are frazzled.
Switching topics for…"
"I would never do it as I personally consider it vain and therefore unmanly.
I would, in good nature, give a friend shit for it. Because that is what friends are for.
I would not however hold it against someones character.
But full disclosure.…"
"I try to keep in mind my place. As a contractor or as an employee, I try to remind myself that I'm a screwdriver in their drawer that they've paid for - and that they would really rather not even have to have the screwdriver. So my role…"