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Matt P's Discussions

Woman with kid: Ultimate trap for Nice Guy?

Started this discussion. Last reply by Michael B. Feb 8, 2013. 6 Replies

AoM,Did not introduce myself but if you noticed from my last post I am a recovering Nice Guy. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Just got out of a 4 month relationship with a girl with a 1 year old son.…Continue

View of Women

Started this discussion. Last reply by Sam Williams Feb 6, 2013. 21 Replies

I grew up in a fairly traditional family. I am 26 and have 3 sisters that are 42, 35, and 24. My mother was pretty much a stay at home mom and she is kind of a push over type. She had a very bad…Continue

 

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Michael B. replied to Matt P's discussion Woman with kid: Ultimate trap for Nice Guy?
"Dismiss your fear of appearing jealous or inexperienced and replace it with the idea that voicing your contentions allows you to figure out if you are dealing with a partner that will develop a mutually enjoyable and interdependent lifestyle, or if…"
Feb 8, 2013
David F. replied to Matt P's discussion Woman with kid: Ultimate trap for Nice Guy?
"There is a difference between being a Nice Guy and a push over.  You can still be nice while explaining your needs and expectations in a relationship. If she goes to a place that sucks up her social time with you, it is fine to ask to…"
Feb 7, 2013
Matt P replied to Matt P's discussion Woman with kid: Ultimate trap for Nice Guy?
"Exactly. Emotion would immediately take over any thought about resolving. It was just anger and bad decisions. "
Feb 6, 2013
Matt P replied to Matt P's discussion Woman with kid: Ultimate trap for Nice Guy?
"Haha... yeah the dude is an asshole. It was more mixing the Nice Guy with the issues she had. The kid just made things go faster. "
Feb 6, 2013
Will replied to Matt P's discussion Woman with kid: Ultimate trap for Nice Guy?
"I don't know if the presence of the child is relevant.  If your relationship with her is strong, well, being a father (or step-) is a delight.  If not, you won't be his father (or step-) anyway. But:  1 y o?  Boy, what…"
Feb 6, 2013
Penelope replied to Matt P's discussion Woman with kid: Ultimate trap for Nice Guy?
"I suppose women with children may especially appeal to men who want to play the hero. I can see where the presence of a child would make someone extra reluctant to be confrontational or express anger. I don't know if experience dating is really…"
Feb 6, 2013
Matt P posted a discussion

Woman with kid: Ultimate trap for Nice Guy?

AoM,Did not introduce myself but if you noticed from my last post I am a recovering Nice Guy. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Just got out of a 4 month relationship with a girl with a 1 year old son. Being the Nice Guy that I was, it did not end well and I was left avoiding conflict once again.Anyways it got me to thinking.... does a woman having a child leave the ultimate trap and project for the Nice Guy? It sure seemed to happen to me. She completely let me in her life with her friends (3 of…See More
Feb 6, 2013
Sam Williams replied to Matt P's discussion View of Women
"Sweet. I'll be interested to hear your thoughts about it."
Feb 6, 2013
Margie replied to Matt P's discussion View of Women
"But I did tell her to ask for what she wanted. I don't think it's manipulative to take other's feelings into consideration. I'm sure it depends on the circumstances, but not in this case. I don't see it. Maybe I do have a…"
Feb 6, 2013
Penelope replied to Matt P's discussion View of Women
"The reality is that after giving her the schpeal, Mom said something like, "OK, but what do you want me to wear?" and then I just told her. In wedding planning, my husband and I found "the rules" good for extended family and…"
Feb 6, 2013
Margie replied to Matt P's discussion View of Women
"I thought it made plenty of sense. There was something that was very meaningful to Rebekah (the Christmas dress she wanted her mother to wear), but she also didn't want to hurt her mother's feelings or overstep her bounds. That's…"
Feb 6, 2013
Margie replied to Matt P's discussion View of Women
"I didn't mean physical violence, Shane, but I will say that I've been known to break a plate or two over the years."
Feb 6, 2013
Will replied to Matt P's discussion View of Women
"General advice?  OK!  Some women are like those in your family (obviously!).  Some are bossy, some are game players, some are assertive.  Best to be observant and see who you're dealing with."
Feb 5, 2013
Penelope replied to Matt P's discussion View of Women
"Agreed. But those are "the rules." This is why I left what I called "AoM for women," the wedding-planning boards. Too many passive-aggressive, unwritten, unspoken (because to make them clear wouldn't be passive-aggressive)…"
Feb 5, 2013
Matt P replied to Matt P's discussion View of Women
"It's a very quick feed forward loop of frustration. The other person becomes distant and you just want them to understand what you feel. What's worse is that I know something needs to be said and be OK with that. Its a whole another matter…"
Feb 5, 2013
Matt P replied to Matt P's discussion View of Women
"Just ordered it Thanks"
Feb 5, 2013

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Brief description: This is a group dedicated to continue the development of manly skills and spread of manly ideals found in the "30 days to Becoming a Better Man" challenge.---------Inspiration: I’m fairly new to AoM and have just finished catching up on the 30 days to Becoming a Better Man. I really enjoyed the process and am forming this group in order to extend what it did for me, and hopefully all of you.I know that I’ve always had troubles following through with things when it’s only me…See More
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