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My ex is back in my life...

Started this discussion. Last reply by Curtis on Wednesday. 23 Replies

Hi Gents, any and all advice would be greatly appreciated...It's been 3 years since my ex and I have shared anything more than a 5 minute catch-up, following our equally long relationship.It didn't…Continue

Constructive Criticism for my friend. Should I, and how?

Started this discussion. Last reply by Steve Fine Apr 3. 15 Replies

My question is two-fold and I apologise in advance for the essay, but this has been bugging me for some time and I would really appreciate your advice.My best friend, Nick, and I are both currently…Continue

Commanding Respect?

Started this discussion. Last reply by Walter B. Pewen Mar 8. 57 Replies

Guys,I would like to transition from the quiet guy in the pack; input unheard and unable to lead conversation, to a (seemingly) outwardly confident man, who speaks with conviction and secures the…Continue

Risk Taking For The Risk Averse?

Started this discussion. Last reply by Curtis Apr 8. 16 Replies

Hi all, I’m brand new to the forum, but I’ve been reading AOM since around 2009.  Please be gentle! I’m 23, live and work in the UK and struggle day to day with knowing and being myself.  I have to…Continue

 

Curtis's Page

Latest Activity

Curtis replied to Al Clunnie's discussion Getting the most out of day to day life
"Hi Al,   This is an interesting topic and got me thinking. Unfortunately, I think some of the main ways in which men/brothers in arms/friends could enrich each other's lives go, for the most part, against the nature of man.   For…"
Friday
Curtis replied to James B.'s discussion Just got a girl's number, need some advice
"Dude, what are you stressing for?  You've done the hard part, now take action.  Call her, ask her WHEN she wants to hang out - decide what you'd like for the two of you to do, be decisive.   If she can't make it…"
Friday
Curtis replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"Hi Adam,   I felt I did a bit of this, displayed a bit of the more assertive, self-confident version of myself.    I've not heard from her since 15th July, which has made it easier to clear my thoughts a bit.  For a few…"
Wednesday
Ricky replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"I agree run!  I also think for whatever it's worth that the damage that you blame on her was already there - and there is lots of deep work for you yet to do.  All the very best to you!  "
Wednesday
Adam T. replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"Thirded, except instead of running I would advocate standing up for yourself. Do some thinking about your self-worth and where you derive that.  Chances are you get some of that from your relationships or your treatment of her specifically.…"
Wednesday
Michael J. K. replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"I have done the same with both my es wives Curtis and it is the best thing really.   My Wife now is my wife the other two did not have the sense to keep me around.   Their loss.  I am glad you came to this conclusion."
Wednesday
Curtis replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"John,   Sound advice, much appreciated. I've been noticing some of these things and found myself analysing it way too much. "Why does it affect me and not her?" kind of scenario ensued, before I slapped myself and snapped out of…"
Jul 17
John Pound replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"Curtis, there are all kinds of red flags here. From what you have written then it may be that you will end up paying for this emotionally. She won't though and will move on. That's an almost certainty. However hard this may be then it…"
Jul 11
Alex Mares replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"Good luck my friend.  I had an 8 year ex gf come into my life a few years back only to realize the pattern...she would go to her ex's whenever she was afraid to make a decision on her own.  I only saw her once, but it was enough for…"
Jul 11
Curtis replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"Well, it was civil yet unfulfilling.   A long conversation, comprising reminiscing (predomninantly on her part), venting about her recent ex and family situation, over dinner and drinks. The entire time, she was giving me many discrete and also…"
Jul 11
Tim replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"Evasion will only pique her interest like you're hiding something. Just say "no," and don't elaborate. If she presses and you feel you have to reply, say something like "I'm not in that place right now" [better]…"
Jul 10
Curtis replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"Quick update guys;   She contacted me again pretty quickly to see me again.  Invited her for a drink tonight.  Fairly local place, but limited chance of bumping in to too many people we know.  I want to get to the bottom of what…"
Jul 10
Nick H replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"You're both. Being a good guy makes you a beacon for damaged people looking to lean on you."
Jul 10
Tim replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"Curtis, it's a fine line between being a helpful guy and being a crutch for lost souls. Take it as reassurance. I wouldn't feel insulted that you're good enough to nurse back to health -- it's a compliment. BUT, remember to keep…"
Jul 9
Regular Joe replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
Jul 9
Rick Shelton replied to Curtis's discussion My ex is back in my life...
"Tell her, up front that you're not interested in a romantic relationship but you will be there to support her if she wants it.  Be staight forward and to the point, don't beat around the bush and DON'T do those things that lovers…"
Jul 9

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Interests
Reading, Writing, Sports, Weight Training, Research, Science, Psychology
Books
Art of War, The Importance of The 20's etc. Anything inspirational or enlightening.
Movies
Deja Vu, The Wolf of Wall Street, Drive, Only God Forgives, Place Beyond The Pines, Analyze This/That and anything Tarantino.
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"Shyness has a strange element of narcissism, a belief that how we look, how we perform, is truly important to other people." - Andre Dubus III

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15 minutes ago
Daniel Rodriguez replied to Josh Williams's discussion I touched her butt.
"I, um, I know this is possible but how."
51 minutes ago
Daniel Rodriguez replied to Josh Williams's discussion I touched her butt.
"It is legal to marry your first cousin in New York. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cousin_marriage#United_States_2"
1 hour ago
Michael D. Denny replied to Josh Williams's discussion I touched her butt.
1 hour ago
Pale Horse replied to Josh Williams's discussion I touched her butt.
"For real?"
1 hour ago
Daniel Rodriguez replied to Josh Williams's discussion I touched her butt.
"Not in New York it isn't! Mwhahaha..."
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George Henry Robbins III replied to Josh Williams's discussion I touched her butt.
"I'm in a blue state and marrying your cousin is illegal."
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Pale Horse replied to Josh Williams's discussion I touched her butt.
"I know a guy whose cousin is also his aunt. *plays banjo a la Deliverance.*"
1 hour ago

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