"I might have misunderstood what you said. But if you meant that I shouldn't have entered a fight with a drunk guy because he was drunk and was not being himself, then I disagree that I would feel bad for hitting a drunk guy.
I did feel bad,…"
Brian D's Groups
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To fight or not to fight
Started this discussion. Last reply by Brian D Jan 2. 69 Replies 0 Likes
I went out bar hopping with my girlfriend last night and as I was returning to get my car, I noticed a guy was pissing right next to my car. Now, he wasn't pissing ON my car, but he was pissing right…Continue
Unclear Career Steps
Started this discussion. Last reply by Brian D Oct 10, 2012. 4 Replies 0 Likes
I currently work as an analyst for a small education management company. Although I am content with my job and I'm not currently seeking to get out, I would like to plan ahead and map out some…Continue
Being manly versus being old-fashioned
Started this discussion. Last reply by Jarhead Sep 29, 2010. 41 Replies 0 Likes
Let me start off by saying that this is one of my favorite websites, and that I am in no way ungrateful for what it attempts to do. At the same time, it seems like there is some confusion about what…Continue
How did the people we aspire to be learn to be men themselves?
Started this discussion. Last reply by Jeff Sep 29, 2010. 19 Replies 0 Likes
We need this website because many of us weren't taught how to be men by our fathers. I get a feeling that back then, taking care of the kids were just one of the many duties of the wife/mother (more…Continue
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Latest Activity
Carl Monster replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"The only reason I mentioned fear was because you mentioned that you typically avoid conflict. Is that out of wisdom or because you are afraid of it? Two different things. I was positing since you are obviously unhappy with yourself over this it…"
Rob replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"
You're right, there's no time to make a conscious choice, which is why it's a good idea to develop prudent unconscious habits of emotional discipline. Martial arts training from a good teacher can help develop them.
"
Will replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"I don't think you understood what I was saying. Or else I don't understand you. You say you wouldn't have felt bad -- but you did feel bad. I don't think anyone questions whether you're drinking…"
Brian D replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"Will,
Frankly, I don't think I would have felt bad. When I go out drinking, I am responsible for how much I drink and how I act. If the guy acts out of line, that's his choice. But I also have a choice to do something about it if it starts…"
Brian D replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"Wayne,
Thanks! I could have use that talk on the night it happened. Felt like a pussy for the rest of the night, haha.
Like I said though, what bothered me wasn't that I didn't fight the guy, but my rationale for not doing so. It might…"
Brian D replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"Carl,
Yes, you're correct. But, I don't think I was directly afraid of the guy, just caught by surprise. As I have never fought anyone before, I didn't have any experience to apply to this situation."
Brian D replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"I understand what you mean. It happens so fast though that there's no time to think about the best way to say/do something. It likely wouldn't even have mattered, as like others said, if the guy was drunk he was going to get angry at me…"
Will replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"I probably would have felt the same. But I absolutely could not fight a drunk for cursing and not be ashamed of myself for doing it. Maybe if you thought of it like this: would you fight a foul-mouthed guy in a wheelchair? or a…"
Carl Monster replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"Brian, I see so much of myself in this. Despite all the speculation as to what could have happened next, or what you could have done differently, you made a decision based not on strength or experience but on being caught off-guard and fear (please…"
Rob replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"I understand that you want to save face in a situation like that. You can save face, be a man, and avoid an un-necessary confrontation too.
Being a man requires good judgement regarding whether a situation justifies escalation or not.
What purpose…"
Stein replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"Here's the deal, Techera. In my lifetime I have been in a lot of fights. I know the practical effects of kicking a man's ass, and having my ass kicked. I have not been in a fight for many years, partly because of age,partly because…"
Carl Monster replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"I don't know. All I know it happens, one reason I avoid conflict to begin with."
Stein replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"Techera, I just wanted to know if you had any real life experience or if the discussion was purely academic.
"
Carl Monster replied to Brian D's discussion To fight or not to fight"But haven't you felt bad for those you have fought when they lost?
The few times I've had to stand up for myself I find myself second-guessing my actions, feeling boorish, like a bully.
Overwhelms the temporary feeling…"
Profile Information
- Interests
- Aviation, music, astronomy, physics, fishing
Comment Wall (5 comments)
- At 12:52am on February 10, 2010,
Brett McKay said… - Welcome aboard, Brian. Glad to have you here.
- At 10:30pm on February 9, 2010,
Michael J. Austin said… - Anytime Brian :)
- At 6:56pm on February 9, 2010,
thehuhman said… - Welcome to the AoM community!
- At 1:16pm on February 9, 2010,
Herb Munson said… - Hi there Brian. Welcome to AoM. Also, thought I'd give you a friendly invite to check out my group, The Great Debate. Just click on "Groups." It's the one with the colorful galaxy picture. It's also one of the most active groups on AoM. In any case, great to have you aboard.
- At 6:31am on February 9, 2010, Michael J. Austin said…
- Hello and welcome to the site !!!!
Latest Activity
Rick Shelton replied to C.C. Dolph's discussion Standing up to "The Man." in the group The Great Debate"I didn't see where or when the cop 'seized' the weapon. Did he ask for it or did he grab it from the guy's holster or hand? If it was handed over then it isn't seizure it is reliquishment."
Rick Shelton replied to LShieldes's discussion Whistleblowers vs leaks vs security in the group The Great Debate"In the classification system we use it is harm to the United States and it's interests. It does not take into account any damage done to a person, political or economic group, or racial group. In the case of the AP leak it was…"
Rick Shelton replied to thedifference's discussion My friend received an anonymous email about me this morning..."Just as if he had found your open notebook and read the journal entry there you need to explain that although it may look like it paints him in a negative light there are more entries showing him in a positive light. Go on to explain that that…"
David F. replied to thedifference's discussion My friend received an anonymous email about me this morning..."What site did you write the blogs on? What app? I hate to break it to you roughly but if you are going to journal you need to choose between a hardcopy (book) which can be lost, or stolen vs digital file. Choosing to blog online has huge risks…"
Stephen Larsen added a discussion to the group New Warriors
My Experience with PIT Training
So I just got back from PIT training this past weekend.Wow.Some really beautiful work done with some wonderful men. It amazes me how I can step into these groups of men and have different standards, viewpoints, and stories and love them like brothers. I truly feel blessed to have these challenging and growing experiences.I had been going to an i group for a while now and so these processes weren't exactly new but discussing them and understanding them on an intellectual level was really…See More
Bill replied to Bill's discussion Shave of the Day - May 2013 in the group Wet Shaving (No Spam!)"Monday, 20 May 2013, Shaving Ritual
Razor: ’68 Slim Adjustable Gillette (Nickel) N4 (set on 7)
Blade: Gillette 7 O’clock Green (4)
Brush: Semogue 610
Cream: Unknown Soap
A/S:…"
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