Looking for some input/ suggestions... I know a guy, very wonderful guy (only child) who is 35 yrs old and still lives at home (claims hes never had the $ to leave cause he has to pay for everything…Continue
"This guy sounds like a he has a very nice personality. Unfortunately for you, the four folks you talk about all are living in their own special little worlds of crazy.
You simply can't help someone who doesn't want to help…"
"It does not take testicles, if he want to be free he needs to find a job away from his current location and move. Or simply tell his father to write and move out and not give his mom the phone number."
"I have to agree with Jack on this. You can't drag someone out of a situation they don't want to be in or can't see the exit for. I had a friend who refused to get over being shy to find a job. He got done with…"
"The only one with testicles who could help this guy, other than himself, would be his father. And his help would come in the form of a swift kick in the ass out the door.
But the fact he knows his son is married but has not told his own wife (the…"
"Be careful. You, despite your good intentions, might be viewed by either this man or his wife as meddling. And they would be right for them to think since you are.
The two of them have some serious issues. Him with his inability to grow up and take…"
"Thx Will! I believe that he does want to be free. Sometimes I wish I had testicles, maybe I could help him more! Im not much of a "woman" in the "traditional" sense. I should have been my fathers second son!"
"Ergo, my suggestions are:
* Listen to him
* Invite him to things w/ company of men. My two big venues are ManKind Project (which is all about men becoming stronger), and a fraternal order, where they're pretty un-self-consciously what…"
"@Will... This guy and his wife are both good friends of mine. I hear about it from both sides. I also agree that no one is "beyond saving".
I am only asking if anything can be done, and if so what/how? Theses two really belong together,…"
"What is your relationship to him?
How do you know this? Did he tell you? If so, then he already knows. Might trying active listening: drawing him out to talk more.
I don't think you should give up on him. Nobody is…"
Looking for some input/ suggestions... I know a guy, very wonderful guy (only child) who is 35 yrs old and still lives at home (claims hes never had the $ to leave cause he has to pay for everything mom wants or get a huge guilt trip/bitching at). He is afraid to stand up to his mother. He hides the fact that he drinks a few beers, dips, and most importantly has a wife!! Been married for over a year but still cant tell his mom... His father knows hes married and is cool with it. Neither will…See More
"Sounds typical of a lot of what I experience when I work with kids today. They are so used to sitting and playing video games or whatever, that they dont adjust well to physical labor/exertion.
With my son I never really let him get started with…"
"We found an innovative solution. I told him if we go on the hike, there would be no complaining ... except by my right hand, who is a character in a lot of our play time (sort of a puppet, but I don't bother with a physical puppet), and…"
"Agreed. But this applies to everything you do with your kid. If you at any point cave to screaming and crying and throwing a fit... well now your kid learns that it's really just a matter of throwing a long and loud enough fit.
"My advice would be to not even treat it as a situation.
For most of human history, in most places, kids sleep in bed or on the floor with the parents, orin the same room.
My father slept in the same bed as his father until my dad was 12, with my…"
"I've seen some of this with my boys. One question is whether he is just verbally whining or physically dragging as well.
If he is just verbally complaining, then it may be a matter of teaching that there are times when it is appropriate…"
"Working with students for my entire professional career, I can assure you that co-sleeping or even same-room sleeping is not the healthiest setting for the developing child. Sleeping in the same room isn't a terrible thing, but it's not…"
"While I don't think co-sleeping will give you the rest you need. I see no problem with sleeping in the same room. Here is what we did.
Our son was in his stroller which had a param setting for the first few weeks. It let my…"