Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Titus Techera on August 20, 2012 at 3:49pm

Just two quick notes. Tocqueville mentioned that adultery was an obvious difference between Frenchmen & Americans - tolerated in France, but abhorred by the moralistic American race. Obviously, this had serious consequences for marriage; it also tied in with another fact Tocqueville adduced, that American women chose their husbands. He suggested also that this was why men could be friends in America; one could not befriend men one feared to introduce to one's wife, not least of all because they may already have met...

As for the situation with sexual mores in France & Japan & Scandinavia, it's worth noticing that their demographics are so far below plummeting that they begin to look like extinction, especially in Japan, where the next generation's prospects are the extinction of brotherhood & sisterhood. America is at replacement levels or thereabout, on the other hand...

Permalink Reply by Titus Techera on August 20, 2012 at 11:39pm

True, but I am advised that non-Hispanic white women also have a higher fertility rate in the US than in Canada, to say nothing of Europe, whose numbers are dismal.

Permalink Reply by Paul_of_TX on August 20, 2012 at 3:52pm

Rubbish. The overwhelming majority of couples who participate in this will not find that it ends well.

Permalink Reply by Rick Shelton on August 21, 2012 at 10:13am

My older brother announced one day that he had an "open marriage", he and his wife were divorced within a year.  I guess that is about as "open" as one can get.

Permalink Reply by Paul_of_TX on August 21, 2012 at 10:49am

I had a cousin who insisted that I needed to live with my wife before we were married. I said it was unnecessary. He mocked my religious beliefs and claimed I didn't know what I was talking about. I am going on 12 years of marriage and he is living with his baby momma after getting a divorce from his first wife who he also had a child with. When ones mind is too open the brain falls right to the floor.

Permalink Reply by Jack Bauer on August 21, 2012 at 11:09am

Pity the fool who takes marital advice from men like that ... or financial advice from broke people.

JB

Permalink Reply by Rick Shelton on August 21, 2012 at 2:20pm

Makes for quite the mess.

Permalink Reply by Jack Bauer on August 20, 2012 at 4:09pm

There appears to be a bizarre pride in adopting an ass-backward morality -- beyond even making excuses for stupidity, and to the point that degenerate people have convinced themselves they occupy the moral high ground.  She seems to make the argument that, not only are affairs alright ... but that they are the truly responsible choice and the secret to a secure marriage.  Up is down, wrong is right ... dogs and cats living together ... mass hysteria.

 

Has it dawned on anyone that you can have an "enduring marriage" and "lots of sex" without the necessity of another chick?  Bed the one you have, dumbass.  She's right there.  Go get 'er.

 

JB

Permalink Reply by Liam S. on August 20, 2012 at 4:46pm

Agreed. It's the same kind of pride we see in discussions about science, higher education, and isolationism as well. A bizarre pride in willful ignorance.

I mostly agree with you, here Jack. Though I don't know if this qualifies as a moral issue... I don't think either side in this discussion can make a claim to have the right answer for everyone. Just the answer that works for us in our own relationships. 

Certainly, for me and my wife, our answer has been the one you provide. She's right there (as it were).  But if others have another arrangement that works for them, so be it - this is not a new argument. I've seen it made in regards to many of the elites in US history - Carnegies, Fitzgeralds, Rockefellers (with varying degrees of plausibility) and always with conscious effort to ensure that the social circles they travelled in, would never even risk meeting. 

Permalink Reply by Rick Shelton on August 21, 2012 at 10:14am

But what if I want two or three of them?

Permalink Reply by Elliott Jason Ridgway on August 21, 2012 at 12:31am

Well said  :)

Permalink Reply by Rick Shelton on August 21, 2012 at 2:21pm

Ummm... First sentence?

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