C'mon Guys
I've been a member of this group for a while now and honestly Will has been the only person putting time and effort into it. WE ARE MEN. one of our defining characteristics is our interest in WOMEN, so if that is why we are all in this group, lets get some discussion going. Now Will already covered the basics of compliment giving and letter writing in a previous post here, but I'm gonna ask for some additional help. Little back story, I spent about two hears single after a previous romantic trauma. By single I mean no monogamous committed relationships. Then, I met the current girlfriend, within a week WHAM. It was like being hit by a ton of bricks, after 1 date, had no interest in the couple girls I generally kept on the back burner, and I knew this girl was something special. Fast foreward 4 months. I love this girl, and her birthday is on monday. I don't wana give her some trite hallmark card, I wana write her a love letter that will blow her away, something she'l keep for the rest of her life. Problem, I've never written a real love letter before. Any help would be rad. As for us as a whole group, nobody is the prefect lover, but I think we all have really strong points, so if we want this group to grow we need to offer advice whenever we feel we're qualified to, and ask for some help when were bad at stuff, nobody's an expert at the whole thing.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Will on -
I think you should, on scrap paper, just start writing whatever you're thinking, including "I don't know what to write here, so I'm just rambling," or whatever comes to mind. In an attempt to answer the question, "What is it I most want her to know I'm thinking about her?"
Then when you've written way too much, including awkward stuff, you can extract the good parts.
I bought a book of wedding invitation reply cards, to write on, because it looks cool and has no Hallmark stuff on it.
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Permalink Reply by Derick Oliphant on -
As was mentioned - writing from the heart, and not the brain, makes all the difference.
Years ago I was greatly influenced by the movie 'Finding Forrester' because Sean Connery's character says just that, and it is so true.
I used to be a big poetry writer, and I have a collection of over 100 self-written poems. One thing I've noticed with every single one is that when I wrote - I wrote the entire poem within 5-10 minutes. I just let it flow, even if things didn't make sense. The key is to literally NOT THINK, but to feel!
I've written a few brief lines to girls, and the same mentality applies - you need to feel and imagine all senses within you. Try to be in touch with smell, touch, site, taste - and apply those to your writing. If it's a woman you really care about, this should be very easy to do.
A sentence can include how she makes you feel, what SHE does that you enjoy - HOW she does it, and every detail that she does it with. Detailed words are the core here - I think it's important to create imagery.
It's also important to create a sense of RELATION. Use words or experiences from your past to re-summon feelings in her from your past together. Show that you not only remember the details of your union, but you relish them and enjoy the small simple things.
For example - my girlfriend went on and on about how surprised she was when I mentioned to her that her hand twitches just slightly when she falls asleep. I notice this almost every night, and it's something I like about her - and it can probably ONLY be applied to her, it's not a generic thing, it's not something that anyone else she knows will know about her. I also made sure to focus the topic on the fact that I loved it about her, and it was good - not bad. And how it made ME feel. And that in result, made her feel.
Once you have a general message after using your heart, then you can use your mind and apply the grammatic rules, check spelling, and even pull out a thesaurus. You can add some more detail where you see fit, and fix any 'tempo' and fluidity mistakes you may have made.
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