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Remembering Dad

This is a group for men who have lost their fathers. It is a place to mourn, celebrate, and remember our fathers and a place for men to share experiences and draw strength from one another.

Members: 140
Latest Activity: Aug 2

Discussion Forum

Why don't we talk enough...

Started by C Indolia. Last reply by Kenneth Aug 2. 3 Replies

Late Mr. Vijay Raj Singh (1950-2015)(respectfully called as Babuji by his village folk)Why don't we talk enough...My dad always had this question to me. Even on my 3 weeks trip to home in 2014, when…Continue

Tags: ShowLoveToYourDadToo, MissMyDadALot, advice, negligence, repentance

Kenneth Greenwell 1944-2016

Started by Adam Greenwell May 24. 0 Replies

Dear Brian, Thank you so much for setting up this page, and thanks to those who support it.My father died on April 17 2016, in Greymouth Hospital, in New Zealand's West Coast. I was informed that he…Continue

Death of my father

Started by Morgan Williams. Last reply by Morgan Williams Dec 29, 2015. 5 Replies

My dad recently passed away on the 21st December 2015, in his late 60s (I am early 30s). He had aggressive pancreatic cancer and probably never really stood a chance, though the doctors were…Continue

Happy Turkey Day!

Started by DM. Last reply by Kenneth Dec 4, 2015. 3 Replies

To the gents who celebrate Thanksgiving, enjoy the day tomorrow!It's my 2nd Thanksgiving without dad. He was the life of the party, and he loved nothing more than getting his family together for the…Continue

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Comment by Edward Warden on August 1, 2016 at 9:24pm
Not all my memories of my dad are pleasant, but one thing that I loved about him was his laugh. He didn't laugh much, but when he did, it was like he was surrendering involuntarily. His laugh was almost helpless, and I would laugh so hard at his laugh that I couldn't breathe. Two movies that made him laugh the hardest were "Stand by Me," specifically the pie-eating scene, and "A Private Function," which made him laugh so hard that I had to leave the theater because I couldn't breathe. Other men have said that I talk about my father differently when I share this about him.
Comment by Adam Greenwell on May 24, 2016 at 10:44am

Dear Brian, 

Thank you so much for setting up this page, and thanks to those who support it.

My father died on April 17 2016, in Greymouth Hospital, in New Zealand's West Coast. I was informed that he was ill, left my home and arrived at the hospital the day after he died. His body rested at a funeral home in a town called Westport, nearly two hours drive north of Greymouth. His funeral was at a place called Little Wanganui, where he and my stepmother owned the local hotel- yet another one and a half hour's drive from Westport.  Some of New Zealand's most beautiful and unsung scenic areas were part of my journey to farewell my father in places I had never been, with a community I never knew, and with a distant step-family that did not grasp our unique father-son bond until it was too late.

Yet we all farewelled him together - now I have returned to my home in New Zealand's North Island and am going through the grieving process with my mother, his first wife, with whom Dad and I emigrated to New Zealand from England as a small family.

We are thinking of returning to England/Ireland, but first I would like to help with the Kenneth Greenwell  Memorial Beach Day planned in his community, and to implement some exciting investments on the West Coast, with two towns and one village there closely connected to his passing and our farewell to him. 

Here are links to the places Dad loved, and my eulogy, I wept openly over his coffin after singing the Irish Blessing to him at the end of the eulogy....

Thank you again for giving myself and others the chance to Remember Dad.

Links to the Little Wanganui Hotel and Karamea Region Close to my Father's Heart:

 

Eulogy:

http://www.linkedin.com/pulse/kenneth-greenwell-14-january-1944-17-...

Comment by Paul MacAlindin on August 9, 2015 at 2:56am

What a wonderful group. My dad passed on New Year's Eve. He was admitted to hospital and a week later, was gone. He donated his body to St Andrews University for medical research because he wanted to be as useful after life as during it. My aunt organised a humanist celebrant for a memorial ceremony. You can see the text here, with pictures of dad's home village, Anstruther, and my aunt's formidable tractor collection.

Journey to the land that time forgot

The more I remember dad, the more I appreciate how much of him is in me.

Love to you all

Paul

Comment by Kenneth on March 19, 2015 at 12:04pm

Thanks Michael. It's still painful, but I suppose in light of everything, we're doing all right under the circumstances. You can really tell when people are praying for you.

Comment by Michael J. K. on March 17, 2015 at 1:36am

Kenneth I hope the next few months go okay for you and your mom.

Comment by Kenneth on February 12, 2015 at 11:58am

Thanks Ryan. I'm trying to do the right thing, and just take each day as it comes. Someone on here said it best, I am acutely aware of Dad's absence.

Comment by Ryan James on February 11, 2015 at 2:42pm

Ken, you're definitely doing the right thing. Offer your support and help and check on her as frequently as you feel you can. She'll come around and it will take time for her, and you to process the sudden change in life as you knew it, with your dad there. It's been 10 months for me since I lost my hero...everything you said, yes sir, it's true and you're spot on..i've experienced much of the same and still am. It never leaves you, you just sort of look at the calendar one day and half a year has passed, wonder where did it go.  You'll get there and it will process in stages, but his loss will be there forever. Just keep strong in faith and family, you'll move through time and get through.

Comment by Kenneth on February 11, 2015 at 1:18pm

Scott, thanks for confirming that I'm doing the right thing by giving Mama her time and some breathing room to process Dad's death, and her emotions, in her own way. I know we're both hurting, and ultimately we each have to find our own ways to reconcile this event in our lives.

Comment by Scott L Ferrell on February 10, 2015 at 6:48pm

You are doing the right thing. I backed off when my father died and I let my mother have her space. She will include you when she is ready. 

Comment by Kenneth on February 10, 2015 at 12:12pm

Today marks one month since I lost Dad, and I still can't really "accept" that he's gone. I feel like I don't really have anyone in my life that I can spill my guts to, and I am trying not to let it render me totally non-functional. Mama has enough on her plate right now dealing with all the legal issues, and she's dealing with her anger over Dad leaving her with so much debt. I am trying to give my mother all the emotional & financial support I can, but on some level, I feel like she's keeping me at arm's length right now. I don't know what else to do but give her space, and try to deal with my grief as privately as possible.

 

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