Remembering Dad

This is a group for men who have lost their fathers. It is a place to mourn, celebrate, and remember our fathers and a place for men to share experiences and draw strength from one another.

Members: 117
Latest Activity: Aug 12

Discussion Forum


Started by Hunter. Last reply by Tim Aug 4. 1 Reply

I just turned 19 two weeks ago. On January 31, 2014, my dad OD'd in his office at work in the middle of the night. I found out from his partner at work who lives in our neighborhood. I came…Continue

Foreclosure of a dream

Started by Ryan James. Last reply by Ryan James Aug 4. 10 Replies

Guys, I have to let it out and please let me apologize to you first, some of you don't have the time or desire to read my story, but that's ok, I know the deal, and life is a busy thing for sure. no…Continue

It's not too late to know your dad.

Started by thehuhman. Last reply by Don Dixon Aug 3. 2 Replies

Happy Father's Day! It's not too late to know your dad...That is the title to a blog post I wrote here, two years ago. It received several replies, and most of the respondents were moved by at least…Continue

Tags: dad, father

2 years later, at times like yesterday

Started by Paul DeLeo Jr.. Last reply by Don Dixon Aug 3. 1 Reply

The article about what the loss of a father does to a man really hit home for me. I felt crazy and weak for some of the feelings I was having, some of which I still have today. My father passed close…Continue

Comment Wall


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Comment by Edward Warden on August 9, 2014 at 7:48pm

One thing that I got from my father -- from both parents, actually -- is a dark, cutting sense of humor.  Once my parents were driving somewhere with my mom's mom and a friend of hers.  My grandmother turned to her friend and said, "You know, I can't think of any two people who have had lives harder than ours," to which my father responded from the driver's seat, "I can think of a few million in India." 

Comment by Edward Warden on August 3, 2014 at 1:22pm

Thanks.  I have. 

Comment by terry sperling on August 3, 2014 at 9:11am

Wow, thats a whole different kind of bond. My dad left when I was five. Man do talk to somebody about this. I wish I had. Years ago.

Comment by Edward Warden on August 1, 2014 at 10:26pm

My dad died March 17, 2007.  I was on a surge deployment on the USS Ronald Reagan in the Sea of Japan.  I had seen him last in early January, and, although he was hospitalized, he was expected to get better.  We had not been close, but our relationship was improving.  He told me that, when I was 7, he removed himself from my upbringing because he thought that my mother and I had formed a bond that he could not come between.  I regarded that as an abdication on his part, so we had a lot of ground to make up. 

Comment by Padre on November 13, 2013 at 2:54pm

Someone asked me how I was doing with my father passing away. It had been about 8 months and it was the first time someone broached the subject and I was grateful for it. I think too often we fear having the uncomfortable conversations with people or we don't know what to say. In reality he didn't need to say anything, he was just giving me the opportunity to share and I think he would have been just fine had I not said anything. What came out somewhat surprised me. 

What I mourn is the absence of his presence. My father was not a big talker, but he was faithful to everyone he met. He didn't command a room, but his presence was felt when he was in the room. He was stable, predictable and reliable; we called him Steadie Eddie (Edwin as his name). I am eternally grateful for the relationship we had. It was not perfect by any means but I had come to a place where I could accept my father for the man he was. I miss him often and have a noted on my computer in his handwiriting that expresses so much more than he will ever know.

Comment by Matt on November 9, 2013 at 9:19am

My dad and my twin passed away when I was little. I have grown up without them in my life, nor had any other direct male role model. I have come to terms with a lot of this over the years...

I just find it hard to make true friends. Does anyone think this is related or can give me any advice? I find it tricky to talk about this subject with my friends, and many of them don't understand anyway...

Is there anyone else who has lost a twin? be great to have a chat sometime. 

Comment by Scott L Ferrell on June 12, 2013 at 2:43pm

I was 21 and a senior in college. My father was 51 when he died. I never had time to look for a father figure, I had to support the family and finish college at the same time. In later years, I came to miss him, how I wished I could have shared my joys and failures with him. 

Comment by Rich T on February 21, 2013 at 9:51pm
My Dad passed in 1996, he was 85 years old. I'll never forget that day, my wife and I were at a convention in Atlantic City. My brother called the hotel and told me. When we got home the family had started to gather. It was not easy. My Dad was a good man a good father and provider. I'm sorry he worked so hard to raise four kids that he didn't really have time for father son activities. But my real sorrow comes from an argument we had and we did not speak for eight years. Time wasted by two hard heads. We did start talking a few years before he died but I don't remember ever telling him how much I loved him. My Mother said he knew I did, but I waited to late. It's not the same saying it at the casket. If your Dad is still with you, please tell him before it's to late, fellas.
Comment by Michael E on February 21, 2013 at 7:48pm

My Dad passed away on the 13th of December 2012.

It is his birthday today and I will never forget what such a great person he was. I still play his music (that he sang) and listen to music he use to listen to. I am also planning to put together a few photos of him for his bar. A shrine/tribute thing.

There is allot of truth to the article.

Especially feels like I am trespassing as I am cleaning up his property. I have not cleaned his bedroom. I can still smell his smell, which puts me at ease. I miss him so much, and sometimes I tear up and my GF asks what is wrong.

For a while, his last moments replay in my head.  In the mornings, Dad use to yell out and I would come running. I still get woken up occasionally because I hear him yelling my name. By the time I quickly get up to see what’s going on, I realise that I will never be able to see him or talk to him again.

After he died shyte really hit the fan.

My sister didn’t see my Dad for about 15 years; she only came into the picture the last two weeks of dying. There were some fights even when dad was alive. It’s only because my mum told my GF, that my sis was only back, out of Pity and she wanted to be in the will (I am pretty angry about that). I don’t have any problems with her being in the will. In fact, I made Dad change it so she could be in the will to save problems. The fact is, my sister is 32 but acts 12, lives at home, has never paid a bill etc. She has not experienced the real world at all.

Dad was not even dead yet and she was like “This is mine, that is half mine”...Like I mean seriously, he wasn’t even dead and she was talking about that shit. Rah! My dad made me promise, that no matter what happens, I never sell the house! I don’t intend to either! As long as I can afford it! Another thing that pissed me off, was that on the day of the funeral, my sister was so jovial, and when we were hosting the wake, she was complaining to me that she couldn’t go to a rave. For God Sake! 

My mum called my GF and says she wants to have a few different evaluators in already. I mean c’mon! I haven’t even been to the lawyers to process the will, which will take ages, I just paid for the funeral and now I have to pay for the tombstone. Mum always shelters, sticks up for, and stands up for her daughter, or makes excuses or anything for her. She shelters her like a 2 year old.

Due to these actions, I am pissed off at my family, and Mum messages me saying “These outside influences have turned you against me!” – What outside influences? I react according to how I am treated. And people appear to be abandoning or turning against me. I can’t talk to my girlfriend, she is on a different wave length, for instance, when dad did die, and she just came in, sat and watched, as if she was some sort of show or something! Didn’t even shed a tear!

Anyways, I know this forum is to celebrate, and remember Dads,  sorry for filling it up with negative stuff. Hopefully after a while, life will get better. I just needed to get some stuff off my chest. Anyways back to work...which will keep me sane for now.

Dad would know what to do!  I will always love you Dad.

Comment by joe grantham on January 4, 2013 at 2:11am

my father passed when I was 10, on valentines day. now its 4 years later, I've grown grown into the young man I am today , I have done the best to follow into his footsteps, its hard, but I keep on keeping on. R.I.P dad



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