People who have never had to deal with masculine identity issues usually think this is silly, but I have found that practicing some behaviors that are typically associated with men has helped strengthen my male self-image. PLEASE ADD TO THE LIST---THE MORE IDEAS WE CAN GET GOING, THE BETTER---but here is a "Starter List" of things any guy can do to get some male-typical habits going:

1. carry a pocket knife
2. pee standing up
3. sleep in your undershorts
4. start wearing ball caps more often
5. get a camo jacket
6. wear tee shirts with hunting or fishing scenes
7. shave with a wet razor
8. buy a pick up truck (big purchase, but well-worth it)
9. pick up the hunting/fishing magazines at the barber shop
10. learn to spit, and do it regularly when outside

These ideas may seem goofey to you--but getting comfortable with masculine mannerisms is a challenge and takes practice for some. What other masculine habits do the rest of you think are good ones to emulate?

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Replies to This Discussion

1 - yes
2 - definitely
3 - maybe?
4 - no. Ball caps look childish, and white trash, I think.
5 - See number 4.
6 - No. No no nonono.
7 - Yes
8 - See 4.
9 - Four
10 - Four

I do not see these "habits" as masculine. Why? Are you from the South? It seems like a very stereotypical image of a Southerner.

I would say a man should be put together, and dressed in his best for society. In addition, he drives a car suited to himself, not necessarily because "men" buy it.

And spitting is just rude. If you are a baseball player in a dugout, or perhaps a 10-year old boy, but a grown adult man? No thank you.
Some people live a "charmed" life---and one wonders what they'd do if they had any REAL problems to worry about. Saliva in the street is a ridiculous thing to get all bent out of shape about.
1. Check. 2 Piss standing up? Over what? Mini-vans are fun. 3. More often? How many days straight? Where? At the office? 4. Will a Skull cap do? 5. Another one? 6. Will a T with blood on it do? 7. No can do. Don't shave 8. Nope. My dogs wanted an SUV 9. Used to when I worked as a fishing guide. WSJ now. 10. Spit? Do you mean Hork a loogy? Gob on the ceiling and leave a hanger? Ptyalize straight up and catch it? That way it doesn't end up on the street.

I agree with Andy, public spitting is rude and anti-social.

Where is it in the man-ual that being a man meant being rude and boorish?

And the roads are full of men driving spanking clean, huge trucks, to make up for deficiencies they have obviously elsewhere. 

Don't buy that one either.

IMHO man-ness comes not from what one wears, does or drives, but the manner in which one goes about his life.

Anyone can buy a truck, but say you had to buy a truck because you got some city kids together and started a community garden, and all of a sudden you needed a truck to regularly bring in manure from a farmer you've made acquaintance with; I would say that's manly.

Many habits
1- Keeping one's room presentable
2-Keeping oneself presentable
3- Cultivating friendliness and respect towards men as men, and women as women.
4- doing one brave thing each day
5- Working out
6- develop one deep passion

That's all I got
One of my earlier bedrooms was featured in a poster entitled "Bless this Mess". I haven't improved, but at least there's no hockey equipment on the bed, and I do maintain one presentable room. 2. Damn you're tough, but 4 days a week is reasonable I think. 3. I can do that. 4. see 5. 6. Go Blackhawks. Damn was I patient on that one.

Much prefer that list. 

I agree with your list as well A.C, I believe more could be added also.

 I like your list A.C.. All good goals!

 

Sorry that all of my ideas didn't work for you Andrew. But at the same time, I disagree with you. You seem to have gone through and nixed anything that seemed even slightly related to oudoor sports (hunting, fishing). Maybe that's just not your thing, but dressing in rugged clothing or in stereotypically masculine clothing isn't trying to be a "macho-man"--it's simply making a public statement of masculine identity. And, as you alluded to, some things may be a geographical consideration (though there is absolutely nothing wrong with identifying with a southern male image).

A big part of it is personal perception---something that may be different from one area to another. For me, buying and driving a pick-up truck is a masculine statement. If that doesn't work for you, perhaps something else would. What I'm actually interested in is knowing what habits, mannerisms, or behaviors you could add to the list rather than a debate as to what's already there. What other things DO work for you other than what's already been brought up?

Andrew Klusman said:
1 - yes
2 - definitely
3 - maybe?
4 - no. Ball caps look childish, and white trash, I think.
5 - See number 4.
6 - No. No no nonono.
7 - Yes
8 - See 4.
9 - Four
10 - Four

I do not see these "habits" as masculine. Why? Are you from the South? It seems like a very stereotypical image of a Southerner.

I would say a man should be put together, and dressed in his best for society. In addition, he drives a car suited to himself, not necessarily because "men" buy it.

And spitting is just rude. If you are a baseball player in a dugout, or perhaps a 10-year old boy, but a grown adult man? No thank you.
Andrew. Name a President who hasn't worn a ball cap since Eisenhower. White trash indeed.
What is important is not the particular habits, but the attitude with them, right?

I'm going to soapbox again, but I feel strongly about it: putting on habits won't make you a man, but putting on the attitudes behind them will (well, that plus initation, integrity, independence, and bravery).

What are the attitudes behind the habits you consider masculine?

I think where the spitting comes in is something like this. When you were a little thing, your mother may have said, no, don't play in the mud, that's disgusting. If you became prissy and couldn't stand to get dirty, that wouldn't serve you as a man. I love getting my hands dirty, and I'm not the least bit ashamed to have mud on my clothes (although I get the point of not sitting on the sofa with them). Sometimes it's fun to be the wild man. If there's a motherly voice inside saying "Don't do it"...do it!

So here's what I do with Todd's list:
1. sometimes
2. of course!
3. sometimes
4. don't wear hats
5. to me, camo for non-hunters is like pretend masculinity; not for me
6. not for me
7. I don't shave. What's manlier than a beard?
8. got a Jeep. cooler
9. no interest
10. no interest

So what habits do I want to add to this list?

11. radical honesty
12. gardening -- gets my hands dirty
13. home repair
14. any sort of competition, especially the physical kind (I do little of it, but I need to do more)
15. telling my wife she's cute
16. none of this "I don't know. Where do you want to go?" With men or women, I'll give options I like, and if someone has another idea, that's fine; but nobody likes a wishy-washy man
17. poker
18. men's clubs (like Knights of Columbus)
19. dirty jokes, but not in mixed company
20. being cocky and funny

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