Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Liam S. on February 8, 2013 at 3:21am

Then it sounds like you've created an impasse for yourself. But you are young yet. 

Good luck. :)

Permalink Reply by Maximilian Hermann Reese on February 8, 2013 at 3:05pm

Thank you sir =) But I still have no idea how to deal with it only how not to.

Permalink Reply by Liam S. on February 8, 2013 at 3:10pm

That's the impasse I referenced. Your decision about what your christianity means to you, and how you have to reconcile your relationship with those who will not likely convert, has put you in a position that only allows for "not to."

I don't know if there is a way through that, without reassessing how you interpret the intent of the bible, and the traditions of the men who wrote it.
Not an easy position to be in, but you will figure things out. :)

Permalink Reply by Rawb on February 8, 2013 at 3:11am

I never recommend anyone to marry outside their faith, and even further I never recommend marrying outside one's tradition/church/denomination. I've found it far too troublesome in other people's marriage, and such a huge help in my own.

Once in college I don't recommend 'recreational dating' either.

Ultimately I'm saying "I wouldn't recommend dating her until after she's converted, and I wouldn't recommend attempting to convert her just so you can date her either."

It will make your life much, much easier.

Permalink Reply by Paul_of_TX on February 8, 2013 at 3:33pm

First I would ask are you dating just for kicks or are you looking for something more serious?

Then I would say it doesn't matter. When I met my wife we got along great and dating was easy because both wanted anything to do with any type of serious relationship. Now we have several kids and have been 10+ years.

Generally I would say it's a bad idea. Why date someone that you would not date seriously?

Permalink Reply by Maximilian Hermann Reese on February 8, 2013 at 3:37pm

Thanks yous. I think I found out what to do. That went quite quickly. Often telling about the problem often helps solving it

Permalink Reply by Paul_of_TX on February 8, 2013 at 3:40pm

Good luck with your decision and God bless.

Permalink Reply by Maximilian Hermann Reese on February 8, 2013 at 6:11pm

Thank you Paul. JHWH's bless on you my brother

Permalink Reply by LShieldes on February 8, 2013 at 3:59pm

What are you doing? IF you don't want to tell, just tell me that it is none of my business.

 

As far as refusing to be in a relationship before 25, be careful, your pride might be telling you one thing, where God might put someone for you in your path that the pride will make you blind to. Also, selfish desires and wants for yourself, etc, etc.

Permalink Reply by Paul_of_TX on February 8, 2013 at 4:11pm

The not dating seriously until 25 or until after college thing baffles me also. You never know when you will meet that special individual. I know people who felt that they really messed up some relationships with people they had before the age of 25. They felt it was someone they could have married and grown old with. We will never know if that could have been or not but putting a limit on when you will find the right person just seems silly to me.

Permalink Reply by Liam S. on February 8, 2013 at 4:17pm

I agree with not rushing things, but an arbitrary limit seems odd.

Permalink Reply by Rebekah on February 8, 2013 at 3:41pm

It's a huge red flag to me that you write so profusely about her beauty and so little about her personality. Ask to see a photo of her grandmother. Would you love her if she looked like that? She will some day.

You're probably not ready for the kind of relationship your infatuation is pushing you into. You haven't taken conscious steps to be in any kind of serious romance at your age, and others are right that interfaith, intercultural romances have their own special challenges. I believe that people who "fall in love" young have to be both very mature and "fall in love" with people from very similar backgrounds.

Avoid being alone with her. Don't date her. Try to be just friends until your last semester of college. If you're still attracted to each other when you're ready to enter the working, adult world, maturely discuss how it would all work out.

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