I'm just curious: How do men figure out who exits the elevator before the other(s)?

It's rare that there are 2 women exiting at the same floor in my building, so I just take the prerogative and go first, no matter that "ladies first" doesn't have much practice in San Francisco business life anymore. But I often leave behind 2 or more men to...duke it out?

My husband, who hasn't worked in a building with elevators for years, didn't have a full answer.

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I typically just defer.  Hold the door and say "after you", or make a hand motion that clearly means "go".  Mostly the same reason I don't sit with my back to the door.  I like having the landscape in front of me when I can.


I'm actually the opposite at a 4-way stop though.  I'm not waiting around for a 4-way staring contest.  I'll wait a second.  If nobody moves, I'm gone.


There are scads of four-way stops by us.

The protocol is in order of who reaches the white line at the stop first.

If you reach it the same time someone else, then you yield to that car if it is on the right. If it's murky I let the other car go so I'm not playing chicken with that person.

But any hesitation from someone else forfeits their turn, and I just go.

It's good to have the bigger vehicle in that situation.

closest to door

In a full elevator, if I'm anywhere near the panel, I hit the "open door" button, a nod to whoever is nearby. 

Otherwise, the rule is whoever is nearest the door goes first to clear the way for everyone else. 

There is no, "no you go" back and forth - any offer is accepted immediately, no counter offers. 

Strange question.  I wonder how you would fair in a barbershop queue.

I thought it was an interesting question.

Didn't you say before that you men rearrange your line-up for women? I assumed it was to get them out of the barbershop as quickly as possible.


Or maybe you were being facetious. I can't always tell.

A barbershop queue is an interesting phenomena.  A man walks into a barber shop and instantly knows his place.  There are no number tickets or writing of names in books or lines to wait in.  You simply walk in, take an open seat, and sit in the chair when it's your turn.  One simply "knows" when it's his turn.

Elevators are similar.  When it's your turn, you move.

Never heard of a barbershop queue either, another thing I've never experienced.

For the wedding, they did my hair first, for both the trials and the day-of. Only time I've come close to a barbershop queue. Left me time on the morning of the wedding to research a guest's consistently lost mail - nothing better to do with my hair done and my bridesmaids out of the house.

You did your hair before you put on your dress?

and my make-up

When the dress is white satin, you wait until the last minute to put it on. All the TV and movies showing women getting ready for nights out in robes are accurate. [I was in a button-down shirt and sweats.]

I suppose it depends on the style of dress.  The rituals I've been witness to, the dress was put on first, so as not to mess up the hair or makeup.


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