Alright, on behalf of a friend of the family that has a 33 yr old daughter that has had very little luck in finding the right guy, I offered to ask the AOM crew.
The young woman seems to be "normal", no psycho tendencies, plenty cute enough by my estimation, educated ( with a Masters degree), teaching at a private school, good job, owns a house, family background is good solid middle class with no baggage. Location is Sacramento area.
Where are all the normal guys? Shes keeps finding mommas boys, wimps, OCD types, bar trolls, depressed / obsessed weirdos.
After following several discussions here, I realize there are a lot of guys that simply don't know how to approach a woman for a date. It seems most of those are the type of guys that spent more time studying and hitting the books than chasing skirts in school. Maybe you guys were the geeks and nerds, but now you've turned out pretty decent, got you education, maybe a job and a future and are ready to start looking for a serious relationship. Maybe you're just in unfamiliar territory and don't know where to look either. I'm not sure where to tell this gal ( or other women in similar situiations) to be looking.
Somebody give me a list of where she needs to be to meet gentlemen.
Some rural areas have up to a 6:1 single men to female ratio. As one lady put it though: "The odds are good, but the goods are odd."
Classic , will use that one .
The labels are mostly mine, and she doesn't need my help. This stems from a casual discussion with her parents. She knows nothing about this forum.
It got me thinking how different the dating scene is for younger people after reading
"Stop Hanging Out With Women and Start Dating Them" from the AOM Main Page.
It seems communication is rarely face to face, or even live on the telephone anymore. That's had got to degrade your social skills, and your availability and chance encounters.
A good place to look is a church of your religion. There are plenty of gentlemen to find in more "gentle" places with a high moral standard and manly leadership skills. I've gone to church most of my life and there are always at every church I've been to very "manly" men that I've always seen as a good role model or person to look up to emulating.
That's just one specific example.
Since you said she owns her home I would suggest her volunteering at Habitat for Humanity where she might meet a nice guy but she will learn how to work on stuff at her house if she doesn’t find one. If she volunteered at a soup kitchen she might meet a nice guy, but even if she doesn’t she might learn some new recipes since the way to a man’s heart is thru his stomach.
I'm younger than 33, with a doctorate, and about to get engaged to a man I met on BART, so maybe I know what I'm talking about, maybe I don't.
Before I met my boyfriend, my priest recommended the Commonwealth Club for meeting someone. It hosts lectures and receptions on current affairs. I was also looking at various professional and alumni organization mixers and book groups dealing with my obscure interests. My boyfriend came up to me on BART because he was reading a book from the same foreign-language publisher I was. Now he's in my book group and sometimes considers joining the Commonwealth Club.
Every church I've ever been a member of, and I've been a member of some church my entire life, had at least twice as many women as men. Para-church organizations can be a different story, though. The one I was involved with before I met my boyfriend had lots of single men around helping with various aspects of its ministry. My boyfriend went looking for women at clubs set up by his synagogue.
So, as I said, I was doing this, but it was just my usual commute that brought my boyfriend into my life, but now we do all these things together, 'cause we both used to do them alone: Kind of like if she were looking for a job, once a week, she should do something where she'll meet people - a class, a professional networking event, a party, a lecture, a concert, a book reading, something.
Ha. I did get engaged 2 weeks after this. I'm trying to remember how I was so aware of the timeline. I think he was just waiting for a chance to talk to my parents.
My advice stands. The only thing I'd tweak is she should have interests outside home and work to improve herself, not to look for a man. It'll make her a better partner when she finds a man.
You met your man via your interests. I think that everyone is a weirdo if you are not part of that interest group.