I'd like to hear how you would personally describe it, and how you can distinguish it from more transient things, such as mere loneliness, or lust.

Personally, I would say when one experiences the true emotion, they feel as if they are briefly in a transcendent state of mind, at one with all of nature, completely in the present and devoid of distracting thoughts; an emotion otherwise only accessible through meditation and connection to a higher power.

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Love isn't an emotion. It's a decision to put someone else's interests before your own. In that regard ... it's pretty easy to distinguish from lust or loneliness, both of which are inherently self-involved.

That reply was all over the place.

You asked "what is love between a man and a woman?". That's the question I answered. It's not a loopy transcendental spiritual experience of higher truth. It's a tangible set of actions taken toward a specific woman.

"Loving" a job isn't actually love at all -- provided you're not insane. "Love", in that case, is a hyperbolic figure of speech indicating a strong preference. Like 'loving' a steak. Or a car. Or a movie. Or whatever. You enjoy what you're getting from it, and prefer it to other options. You wouldn't die for it. Or sacrifice yourself. Or put it's interests above your own. It's an inanimate object.

Again, fairly easy to distinguish from lust, pride, loneliness, etc. All of those -- as well as 'preference' above -- are self-focused. It's a transactional relationship about what you're getting, not what you're willing to give. Love is the opposite.

I've never been called 'secularistic' before. Or worldly. Or naive. First time for everything. Heh.

When Christ was asked about His commandment to "Love your neighbor as yourself" in Luke 10, He described a Samaritan who showed mercy to a stranded, half-dead Jew ... and took action to help him. Love is ACTION. According to Christ Himself.

We can pick apart the Greek translations of the word 'love', if you'd like. Suffice to say, love not an emotion, in that context. It's a deliberate, purposeful, selfless action. There's nothing loopy or spiritual or transcendental about that. It's practical. As intended.


Spinning the orthodox understanding of Christ's Great Commandment as "atheistic" is unique.  Never heard that before.

Either way, it's certainly not "out of context".  There is no additional context.  That's the whole parable.  If Christ needed to mention the Samaritan's feelings to clarify His explanation of how to love your neighbor ... I trust He would've.


I think it is a blend.  That settles toward this.

Emotions including friendship, lust, etc start the foundations.  It builds as it moves more toward a deep friendship.  Sex can deepen the bonds if it is focused as a shared mutual pleasure.

Yet so can mutually shared experiences also form strong bonds.  You see such acts (a decision to put someone else's interests before your own) in war as much as marriage, I would guess.

Marriage for me is work.  My wife and I both agree marriage is work.  It is good work and has it's pleasures and joys.  but I do think over time a good marriage is a balance of "a decision to put someone else's interests before your own" and good communication so that everyone has their needs and interests taken care of.

"That reply was all over the place."

It is not alone!

Interesting question. I was tempted to say something flippant like 'when you don't kick her out the bed for farting' but on a serious note, I agree with the idea that it's being willing to put her interests before your own. It's being willing to do things for her without expecting anything in return. It's sticking by her no matter what happens.

A consistently higher concentration of oxytocin, relative to serotonin. 



Oh, stop it, you're getting me hot.

That would be the serotonin + dopamine, mostly. 


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