OK. It is Saturday afternoon, and the weather is beautiful here. It's the perfect kind of day. No pressure, no work, lotsa freedom. I like it!Oh... but I was just reminded by my loving wife, that I should get cleaned up and put my suit on, as we are attending an out of town wedding this afternoon. I forgot all about it. (and I barely know these people.) All of a sudden, I'm sinking. I feel as though I'd rather have a root canal, than to endure this upcoming event.
OK... OK... I'm now in the middle of an attitude adjustment; so I will be OK. I will take one for the team... and be the good husband. I will not make it a miserable experience for my wife. I'm starting to smile again. It won't be so bad. I mean, it's at an exclusive beach resort. I'll see some old friends, make some new ones, have a few drinks, and enjoy a great meal. Should be a fine time for all.
My question is why do we (guys) hate going to weddings? Comments anyone? (besides the one I opened with)
Weddings are one of those things that I drag my feet to, but when I get there, I end up having a good time. You talk, dance, meet new people, etc. I'm trying to learn to cut out the feet dragging part and just enjoy myself.
Because they're BORING. I couldn't wait until MY OWN wedding was over.
Sure, you're happy for the newlyweds, and it's nice to remember back when you were in their shoes (sometimes), but that doesn't change the fact that weddings typically consist of sitting in one place for a long time, then driving to another place where you sit again. Sometimes there's drunken dancing, but I don't like drinking or dancing, so even that's boring to me.
No "get to" about that; I prefer casual, thank-you-very-much. My wife does like to get dolled up from time to time, though, so that's nice.
The last wedding I went to was for a distant cousin of my wife's, so it was more of a family reunion for her, and I was on display as the husband that most of them hadn't met yet. I absolutely hate being on display, so that recent experience could be coloring my opinion of weddings somewhat. :)
I dislike going to weddings for a couple of reasons. The main reason is that I'm not comfortable in those types of social settings. I wind up hanging out with people that I already hang out, so what's the point. Plus, I'm lazy and dislike having to leave my home.
Ya'll have clearly never been to a Denny family wedding. When we hold a marriage ceremony, the after affects leave the pastor ashamed of his congregation, there are at least three arrests made, two wrecked vehicles, three or four fist fights atwixt cousins, and half the family wake up the next morning nekkid in the front yard with blow flies circling overhead and two buzzards waiting to check if you're still alive or not. And Jack Daniels Distillery stock has gone up 4 percent.
When I was single and unattached, I loved going to weddings because there are a lot of single women at weddings, and weddings push certain buttons in women that make them easy pickings. Now that I'm in a committed relationship, I don't chase women, and I don't cheat. If I go to a wedding alone, I may flirt playfully (but nonsexually), but I'm not in hunting mode. If I go to a wedding with my girlfriend, I'm social, but non-flirtatious, and let her take the lead. To be honest, it makes weddings less fun that when I'm single. But I still use weddings to hone my social skills.
Weddings are such a feminine domain. Do any of us give a crap about centre pieces, or floral patterns, or the dress, the bridesmaid dresses or seating arrangements? The whole thing is pretty much entirely about the bride. Even the man she is marrying seems like just another accessory in the whole ceremony. As a man, I find the process to be kind of degrading. It just throws insult to injury by making us wear a heavy suit on some of the hottest days of the summer. It also reminds me of this video I came across.
I don't like going to weddings when you know the marriage won't last or that the couple won't enjoy their life together. You know the weddings I'm talking about: the groom is a complete jerk or the bride is a spoiled, selfish child. I dread going to those ceremonies. Everything feels forced and contrived.
On the other hand, when I attend a ceremony where I know both the bride and groom and know they truly love each other, those are the weddings I don't mind attending. Those tend to be great parties. Lots of love, laughter, and great fellowship. You can "feel" it in the atmosphere and sense it in the guests' smiles. I really enjoy those.
As for the weddings where I don't know the people well, I usually don't attend those.
I agree with you, Jeffre. It definitely makes a difference how invested I am personally in the "happy couple," and how optimistic I am about their union.
As I mentioned earlier, the wedding I just attended a couple of weeks ago was for my wife's distant cousin (my wife hadn't seen her for ~15 years), who was marrying a man neither my wife nor I knew. We spent the whole time sitting at a table with my brother-in-law and his wife, chatting it up while waiting for the reception to wind down. We could have had the same experience over dinner and drinks at a casual restaurant.