I went out bar hopping with my girlfriend last night and as I was returning to get my car, I noticed a guy was pissing right next to my car. Now, he wasn't pissing ON my car, but he was pissing right under the driver's door. I guess he was using my car more to cover himself than anything. Anyways, I saw him doing it as I was walking up to my car, and I was like "Hey man, what are you doing, pissing on my car?", and he told me to f*** off and called me a mother******. I have always been the kind to avoid conflict in my life, so I just got in my car and left. My girlfriend said she was glad that I didn't confront the guy, but that I should at least have said something to him. It left me feeling like a p**** for the rest of the night. I've always liked Theodore Roosevelt's quote that "The unforgivable crime is soft hitting. Do not hit at all if it can be avoided; but never hit softly". So I tried to justify it as I was just being the bigger man and not getting into a stupid fight. But I can't help but to think that my manliness was challenged and I failed. How would you guys approach this? The guy was pretty drunk, and I had only had one beer.
What you wanted him to do was to stop pissing near your car, and it sounds like he did. Your around to tell the story. Much more manly.
Success is manliness? From assassins to stool pigeons, a lot of creatures get their way & are around to tell without being manly--even conformists, on occasion! Or manlier than those who create straightforward confrontation! Stein, you're too decent, really...
That's the cowardly thing, 'fear of conflict' talk. The facts are simple. A guy wants to fight or does not. Opportunities arise easily for both; there's never a dearth of reasons for either. There is a difference between shame for weakness & fear for your reputation. A man who goes around stealing stuff may nevertheless fear for his reputation, whatever his shameless pursuit of substance. Pride may mean either, the way you use it. Hell, a guy who wants to avoid conflict usually wants to avoid these complicated kinds of thoughts, too.
The girl may have a point that he should have been tougher, just like you have a point that the drunk was protective. If he's just another joe, then yes, he needs to be tougher. As any of the tougher guys around here would say, the first step is to stop worrying about these things...
My mouth used to get me into a lot of fights, so I may err too much on the of caution, remembering the pain in my jaw and nuts.
Might could. You may be right about not moving the guy to fighting. But calling that manly? What's less believeable than that?
Survival, so you can procreate.
First, not all who survive procreate--not all who die die without having procreated--& some are too close to call.
Secondly, manliness & procreation have little in common. Animals procreate, too, so it's not a human thing; so do women, so for humans it's not particularly for men. & further, I'm told procreation is good for your genes, but says nothing about you...
Is this the Great Debate?
It was about to become a pretty big debate, anyway... So I'll see you around. Or should I say: Don't let me catch you around the Great Debate?
No I just think different areas of this site are for different purposes. This man is seeking advice. I think it would have been fine for him to say, you better get the fuck away from my car, or something of the like. But it was not worth blood and guts. Any way, no fair when only one guy is drunk.
Like Arnold says in Hamlet: Who said I'm fair?