When I was a kid my dad had a few sayings that I've passed on to my kids. My dad's most prominent one when we would say we didn't want to do something was: You don't have to want to, you just have to. I've shortened it to: You don't have to want to. Anyone else have any sayings their parents used that they've used with their children?

Tags: children, dad, family, kids

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Is this a you problem, or a me problem? ... Then who needs to fix it?

Shit in one hand, want in the other and see which one fills up first.
-Mom

After doing something stupid that resulted in pain my dad would say "do that again I didn't see it the first time."

I forgot about this one. My mom used to use this one as well.

I tell my kids;

There are 3 things you can do with a problem: whine about it, live with it, do something about it.

Never assume the person driving the other car is a better driver than you are.

Always watch the front tires, they'll tell you where that car is going.

Watch where your head, hands, and feet are going; everything else will follow. (My 4 year old was constantly bumping his head on stuff).

don't start a fight but be sure to end it.

+1

Me: Where is my {misc. toy or object of mine}?

Dad: If it was up your ass eating a ham sandwich you'd know where it was.

The last post reminded me of another one: If it were a snake it would have bit you.

Also, Grandpa had a good saying for trying to get out the door: We're off like a herd of turtles.

Off like a prom dress.

A lot of you seem to have lived with the father in "S--- My Dad Says."

Like a few others on here, I don't have kids yet. When I do, however, I plan to use some of these "Dad sayings."

*me complaining about something I can't change* "Welp, if frogs had wings, they wouldn't bump their ass every time they jumped."

"It couldn't have hurt that bad. I didn't feel it!"

"You whine like a mule, and you move like pond water."

"Thank you, son. You are a gentleman and a scholar, and I hope that all your babies come out nekkid."

 

A few I don't plan to use:

 

"I dunno. I just live here."

"Welp, gotta have a shmoke."

"Do you want me to give you something to really cry about?"

The third one , got that one on a regular basis .

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