Permalink Reply by Shane on November 18, 2012 at 7:17pm State your personal beliefs, but don't just make sh it up.
Sex outside of marriage is overrated.
And the millions of people in marriages who are dissatisfied with their sex lives? Sex as some driver of your personhood is overrated, in or out of marriage.
If you start having sex with this girl because she wants it, and don't end spending your life with her, you'll feel like your heart has been ripped out and stomped on, and she'll likely feel the same or worse.
Even without sex that will happen.
The divorce rate in this country is somewhere around 50% because sex is cheap and people have little concept of what love is anymore.
Not only not true, a stupid conclusion to arrive at. Not only are divorce rates well under 50%, they've been falling since the turn of the century. Number one cause of divorce in America, money problems. Number one cause of divorce in the UK, falling out of love.
Love is not a magical feeling that comes over you and never leaves if you've found "the one". Love is a choice/effort that has to be made constantly. That glorious initial affection will fade in any relationship, and each party must consciously choose to continue loving the other if there's to be any hope of a future for the couple.
Way to make a case for not bothering with marriage at all.
Permalink Reply by Joe on November 18, 2012 at 9:33pm State your personal beliefs, but don't just make sh it up.
Those were my personal beliefs friend.
Permalink Reply by Shane on November 18, 2012 at 9:37pm I made a mistake, divorce rates have been falling since the 1980's.
Permalink Reply by Joe on November 18, 2012 at 9:45pm The stats are discouraging either way, in my opinion.
Permalink Reply by Shane on November 18, 2012 at 10:02pm That's what happens when you marry for love instead of increasing land holdings or solidifying political treaties.
I guess that means I can now make Ireland a province of Canada. Wish I got it before 2008 though.
I read today that they peaked in the 70's.
EDIT: Hmmm... actually, I think it was marriage rates I read. Never mind
Permalink Reply by Shane on November 19, 2012 at 6:11pm It gets a bit convoluted because no one seems willing to do the math on the statistics. It's much easier to be lazy and say, there's twice as many marriages every year than divorces, so the divorce rate is 50%.
Permalink Reply by JonEdanger on November 19, 2012 at 6:01pm If you start having sex with this girl because she wants it, and don't end spending your life with her, you'll feel like your heart has been ripped out and stomped on, and she'll likely feel the same or worse.
If you don't start having sex with this girl because she wants it, and don't end spending your life with her, you'll feel like your heart has been ripped out and stomped on, and she'll likely feel the same or worse.
Permalink Reply by Daniel T. on November 19, 2012 at 7:04pm I had sex with a girl cause she wanted it. I didn't end up spending my life with her.
Neither of our hearts are damaged now that it's over.
Did I disprove Joe's theory? Or is it just that I am an evil soulless atheist and my ex a tempting Jewess? ;P
Permalink Reply by The Dutch Dastard on November 20, 2012 at 2:31am I did the same "once or twice"(heh), without damaging any hearts (or psyche's). I did get it damaged one time, but it definitely wouldn't have helped to not have sex before.
I suspect we atheists (for me actually agnost with strong atheistic tendencies) are technically incapable of love.
Permalink Reply by StaggerLee on November 18, 2012 at 7:52pm If you are feeling pressure to perform, is it not possible that you are also sub-coming to pressure to lose your virginity in the first place? After all, being a virgin male is not overly prized these days.
As a Catholic, I have pretty strong thoughts regarding sex outside of marriage and assume you have heard them before unless you have been living under a rock somewhere, so I'll not get overly preachy on that score. If you want that slant on the topic, re-ask your question in Catholic or Christian men.
Otherwise, as I would tell any man regardless of faith history, you only have one first-time opportunity. No matter what else happens in your life, you can never go back to being a virgin again. Once the cat is out of the bag all that is left is a re-commitment to chastity if you so choose. So if you must, spend wisely!
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