This is what Real Men are about.  This is just my opinion, take it or leave it.

1. Have you're own place. Don't live with your parents.  Exceptions to this are you're 18 and younger, going through a divorce or bad break up, going to college and it saves you money, yourself or your parents are struggling or in bad health.

2. Have a car. Exceptions to this are you live in a big city where it's not feasible to own a car.

3. Have a normal (short) haircut.  Seriously no long hair... You're not a viking, Fabio, or a pro wrestler.  Real men go to barbershops not salons PERIOD. No dying you're hair, no highlights, and real men don't use a whole lot of products. Again a classic haircut is to be desired.  

4. Facial hair is acceptable, but if you're going to have facial hair it needs to be rugged, yet refined. There's a balance between rugged and homeless looking.  It's acceptable to have a full beard, but learn how to take care of it so you don't look like Charles Manson.  However, don't over groom and sculpt it because that looks super feminine and just not manly.

5. Clothing.  If you're a grown man than dress that way. No you don't need to wear a 3 piece suit everyday of your life, but at least own clothes that say Hey I'm an adult, and I look good but at the same time I'm not trying too hard.  Here's how you do it:

A. Wear darker jeans with no holes, no fading, etc.

B. None of your clothes should have huge logos, bedazzling, graphics, or stupid "funny" references.

C. Your clothes should fit you.  Not too baggy, not too slim.  No skinny BS PERIOD!

D. Get yourself some quality footwear. No guy in his 30's should be wearing Jordans. The only exception to this is you're Micheal Jordan.  Seriously get yourself a good pair of boots like red wing, wolverine, chippewa, thorogood, etc.  If you're going to wear sneakers it needs to be something old school and classic (plain) such as chuck taylors, jack purcell's, vans era, etc.

E. It's good to have at least one basic suit. Just incase. Also learn how to tie a tie.

6. Go easy on the cologne.

7. Violence isn't the answer, however real men know how to defend themselves and their family.

8. Do things outside.

9. Real men know how to cook their own meals, clean, pay bills, balance their finances, keep up with housework, and take care of their responsibilities. 

10. Real men can do basic maintenance on many things.  You're parents or God help you, your wives shouldn't be changing your tires, oil, lightbulbs, etc. 

11. Have some pride. Real men carry themselves professionally. It's not playtime anymore, it's time to grow up.

12. Be well read, and be educated.  No matter what anyone says, being up to date on current events and having knowledge is manly. Read books, go to school, learn a trade, have opinions on the world around you. Stand for something.  And at the same time be prepared to maturely voice your opinions and have logical discussions.  Again this should never lead to fighting if someone believes differently.  Just take it at face value and go on with your life.

These are just things that I can think of off the top of my head.  Did I miss anything?

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I agree with pretty much everything to the letter actually, except the salon part. I go to a salon to get a good scissor trim. My hair is so thick that if it's cut with clippers it grows out frizzy ends and becomes so thick and puffy that it's impossible to make look nice. I scissor trim and thin out my hair every 5 weeks or so to keep it looking nice. I do, however, wear my hair short and combed over. I agree that should be the standard. 

It's always been true that people grow up at different times, but my generation hasn't seemed to figure out that having a kid, then getting married at 21, and then going in debt to stay afloat isn't becoming an "adult". I will still occasionally wear the graphic T around the house, but if I'm out in public I want to look my age. 

Real men prefer their elders and ladies.

Real men don't tend to think of themselves that way and couldn't care less if others do.  They just are.  

Meaning no offense, Specs, but I find much of what is listed to be trivial and inconsequential.  If a male fulfills his duties, responsibilities and obligations to himself, his family, his loved ones, his workplace, and to his country (add to his god if you are religious), then he is a man.   All else is fluff.

I want to preface this by affirming that based on what little I know of you so far, I have a great respect for you and I mean zero offense. I'm a 24 year-old young man who even though has amazing parents, has still grown up in a world with very little morality and higher standards left, and I love to debate things and learn. 

I do, however, think that your way of thinking has stemmed from a lazy approach to just give things a pass rather than maintain traditional values that have proven themselves effective. Now I of course don't mean that every man should part his hair and comb it the same way, but your outward appearance along with your daily habits go a long way in saying who you are. Taking care of your family and other important responsibilities are certainly at the top of the list, but to say that everything else listed is trivial is in my opinion a naive way of thinking. A general "man code" is a very beneficial and sometimes necessary thing. It's those little things our fathers and uncles teach us. 

No offense taken, Wickett, and I do understand your point.

My views are generally broader based than most.  I often consider the whole of humanity rather than look through the narrow prism of American culture.  

What is manly or not is very much cultural.  In South America it is common to see boys and men who are good friends or relatives with their arms around each other's shoulders.  In places in the Middle East, they hold hands. Not manly?  Mr Miyagi of Karate Kid fame had a scraggly beard, wore baggy pants, got plastered, wore sandals and cultivated Bonsai trees.  He wasn't very manly?  There are African warriors who spend more time on their hair and facial appearance than the women.  Not manly?  

I hope you get my point.  Let us not loose sight of the forest by concentrating on the trees.  I believe that what I listed as making for a man will go for just about every male in every country on earth.   What do you think?

Great points, can't say I disagree at all. I do believe that sons in whatever culture should be taught their heritage and how to follow in the footsteps of their ancestors while also trying to improve on it. I still think a lot of the little things matter, but if you're going to include culture all around the world then of course there are going to be a lot of exceptions. 

Argyraspide is right on this. It's not a lazy approach to have a broad view. Most of this list is trivial. Not that I disagree with a lot of what he said, because spending time outside is great. Hygiene and wearing clothes that fit is important. Keeping up with current events and being educated make you interesting. But none of this is what "makes a man". The traits that make a good father, a good husband, a good brother, or son, or member of your community, or citizen, role model, coworker, eclipses this list entirely. 


These are just things that I can think of off the top of my head.  Did I miss anything?

Cans of whup-ass.

Real men are built from Character, integrity, honor, and grit.

Personal style choices are just that, personal.

Physically fit, tactically fit, and spiritually fit, with the heart of a warrior.

Does this mean you wear your sisters skinny jeans? Ha jk.

This is great!  Its the list of things I also would have listed = and live by.  But the funny part is all the exceptions you give.  Let's be real - the list without the exceptions is putting guys into a box, and a guy who is too hung up on fitting into the mold or the box is already not too manly.

So here's to my brothers, the creatives and the cooks. The guys who have a knack for what looks good in a home, on a plate or their face.  Here's to the man who makes plants grow, in a pot or in the garden. The guys who can lift heavy things and change a baby's diaper. The guys who whip away tears, from their face and their daughters. 

Here's to you my friend - the man who is truly authentic - true to who he is was created to be.

Define "a whole lot of products" for hair. I think 2 is a good number. Wait. Does shampoo count?

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