I find the quest for self-improvement to be quite taxing.  I find it to be an emotional rollercoaster that mixes bouts of motivation, self-pride, and excitement, with equal parts depression, lack of discipline, and discouragement.  Sometimes when I get down on myself and start to lose focus on the task at hand - the task of becoming a better man - I need to retreat into myself for awhile, and be away from human contact, or at least contact with those that make up my everyday.  I find that the introspective process that inevitably accompanies solitude can be quite uplifting and recharging.  I feel like things come into focus when I spend extended periods largely on my own, and that I am able to chart a step by step course for the immediate future.

The struggle I have is sustaining the motivation and direction when things return to normal and I am back in touch with my wife and close friends.

Does anyone else find solitude to be as rewarding as I've described?

Tags: alone, discipline, motivation, solitude

Views: 363

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Absolutely. Best advice I can give you (and yes, it's a cliche, but for a reason): Pick up fishing. Not to catch fish. But because it gives you the perfect excuse to head to the hills, or even the local lake, for some peace and quiet. I'm lucky enough to live in an area where good fishing is literally ten minutes away. So many a night, after work, I can be found on a lake, alone, fishing.

As Nietzsche would say, sometimes you just have to escape the flies in the marketplace.
I completely agree with this. Solitude is a must for any man. It's just finding what fits you is the challenge. I recently went camping for Father's Day for the first time in almost 10+ years. I forgot how much wilderness can recharge you for life. I had got in the habit of playing video games for my escape which doesn't even compare to the outdoors.

So if there was a handbook to be given to every man out there I would definitely say that solitude would be in the first few chapters and the last to drive it home.
"Solitude is a must for any man. It's just finding what fits you is the challenge".

+1
+2.

Sometimes I think it is one of the main things that keeps a man sane. It is a must.
A retreat to a quiet spot on the water as often as possible has become a staple in my life; rain or shine, day or night, in the heat of summer or the chill of winter, the rocky Coast of Maine provides me with a place to retreat not only into myself, but into the natural world, away from my cell phone, TV, computer, and (for a brief period) from the worries of my life.
I have little to add to the conversation, but feel the need to reply anyway.

To answer your question, I find solitude to be not only rewarding, but necessary. Typically, like those who commented before me suggested, nature is a necessity; there is nowhere more fitting for a man to contemplate his own existence than when he is surrounded by the soil and the sky from which he was created (and I don't mean that in the strictly religious sense, but I cannot deny a sense of oneness with the world around me). For me, music is also essential. Art is a demonstration that humanity is capable of contemplating what else is possible, and what could be. While I can make no claims to contribute to humanity's collection of art, I have no problem using that of others to help my own development.

With regards to the struggle you have suggested awaits you on the return to the 'real world', perhaps music may help? If you are anything like me, music is explicitly tied to memorable moments, and there's nothing more helpful to reigniting that personal motivation than the private, deeply personal bond you will have created with a song or album. Plus, its easily to incorporate it into your everyday life, and no one needs to know your reasons behind listening to it.
Definately Neccesary. Especially since were all so busy being exposed to all these things all the time its important to step back.
Ask yourself who you are becoming. Id Imagine you feel better when you do that.
I try to go into the woods and absorb the serenity that it provides and helps clear my mind cause it is calm and peaceful like a ocean and yet closer for one to reach.
I do the opposite, in many ways. I'll go to the woods and hike until my body wants to give out. No one watching, no one to impress, no one to say anything about just how ungodly heavily you're breathing. Just conquer for the sake of telling that mountain who's boss. Build your serenity by creating chaos in your quads from the verticals and your lungs burning like the sun- so when you stop, the mere absence of that pain builds a peace and contentment.

Throw a pack on. Nothing will satisfy like catching and cooking from the land with no help besides a knife and some string. Okay, maybe a hook. Live like your forefathers, see what they see. If you can hear or see cars, go further. Explore. Pioneer. Discover. Be.
Andrew,
There is even an article about humans and nature. The summary of it was the humans who were in a position at work or home to look at or be around nature were collectively less irritable and stressed than those who were able to get out in and look at nature on a regular basis.
I can certainly agree. The woods/mountains/ocean, etc. have a calming effect on humans (myself included) that has no equal.
I would much rather have my 1160 sq ft house on 1/4 acre land in the 'burbs than a 3000 sq ft house in the city with no lot.
Solitude and Leadership

A great essay on solitude.
What you said is something I have struggled to put into words for a long time. Well done! I love my alone time. I used to ride motorcycles and that was the best time. Just out there on my own, no distractions, not even a car stereo...just you and your thoughts, or no thoughts at all.

RSS

Latest Activity

Padre posted a discussion

Girls in football

I was just watching Sunday Night Football and they had the commercial talking about this high school girl who is the QB for football. Am I just out of step with things or does this just not seem like a good idea. I just do not see how having co-ed sports at higher levels is ever a good idea. Any thoughts?See More
12 minutes ago
Will replied to Christian's discussion 20 year old looking for advice from you "white collar" gents.....is the money worth it?
"I teach.  Money is good, and I get to pick my projects, and I'm doing two things I love:  teaching, and programming.  YMMV."
24 minutes ago
Mark Phillippo updated their profile
56 minutes ago
Sean replied to Vytautas's discussion What Do We Learn From History?
"I minored in history at University.  It is my belief from this experience that, on the whole, the people who study the past or who read the old books are the academics, and they of all people are the ones least likely to gain any benefit from…"
2 hours ago
Sean replied to AlanR's discussion Picking up a side hustle - Investing the time and energy before you see a payoff.
"Have a side hustle or two. I used to have more. my main side hustle is being a woodworker and cabinet maker. Unfortunately, there is not much money in it for quality work. Too much competition from Nordic Surprise and their ilk. The woodworkers I…"
3 hours ago
Josh100LuBu posted a video

Me Winning The 2014 Britain Finals (Over 50's Champion)

Highlight video of me winning The Britain Finals & taking home the gold. I trained all year for The Finals and placed 1st.
3 hours ago
Leto Atreides II replied to Josh100LuBu's discussion My Fathers Bodybuilding Progress Leading Towards The 2014 Championships.
"Anabolic Steroids FTW!"
3 hours ago
P. Stevenson replied to RL Waldron's discussion Search for a High Quality Wallet
"They say that shark wallets are pretty durable http://www.realmenswallets.com/shark-wallet-shark-skin-wallet/What do you think?"
3 hours ago

© 2014   Created by Brett McKay.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service