I have always had an interest for bucket lists--why we make them, why some do the things on their list, and why some don't.

I just found this site a couple of months ago, while putting my "manly" bucket list together. I ended up with a list ranging from killing a bear and growing a beard to being a better husband and father. I have found that those that make bucket lists are "dreamers." One of my main goals with join AOM as a member is to see if I can transform myself from being merely a dreamer and into a doer!

If I can become more assertive from the blog posts and/or conversations with the men of AOM, I will consider it a win.

Snipped about me: I'm 24, married, and have the most courageous 17 month old son in the world! I work as a MLO--Mortgage Loan Originator as my profession and run a blog about bucket lists in my spare time--which there is very little of nowadays...and that's a good thing. I love spending time with my family, especially outdoors.

That's all for now. Look forward to meeting a lot of you!

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The difference between a dreamer and a doer is a plan.  A goal without a plan is a wish.  So, make a plan to accomplish the goals you have ... and execute them.  The real challenge to a bucket list isn't making the list, its overcoming inertia.

Some of your goals sound a bit vague, though.  "Grow a beard" and "kill a bear" (with a loose leaf notebook?) are clear enough.  "Be a better husband and father" isn't at all specific enough, though.  There's no action there.  And, there's no way to tell if you've accomplished the goal.  What do you want to do that will make you a better father?  Spend time with the kids every night?  Sit down at dinner with them?  Double the sex life with the wife?  Date nights?  What is the action you want to take?

With bucket lists, you need a specific measure so you can check that item off your list when its accomplished.  Vague "self-betterment" goals are fine in theory, but you need to do something to make them more concrete so you can get to work on them.


JB

Great advice, Jack!

I do have some specifics steps to "achieve" each goal, but I haven't listed those publicly on my blog. Maybe putting them out there would hold me accountable to those goals.

I do need to expand on each thought a little more for myself to, as you said, put a plan of action with each goal.

Do you have a bucket list? If so, what's on yours?

I don't have a specific list.  Just a bunch of general ideas.

I'd like to wrestle an alligator.  And try bull-riding.  Attempt competitive boxing.  Learn to field dress an animal.  Go big game hunting.  Go bowhunting.  (Lots of hunting stuff.  Never been.)  Take up woodworking ... I'd like to furnish my own house.  Drive a NASCAR.  Go heli-hogging.  Become an ordained minister.  Pay off my student loans by the time I'm 40.  Live out in the country.  Eat various exotic animals.  Travel the 50-states ... particularly Alaska.  Visit Australia.  Learn to sail.  Finish a 48 oz. porterhouse (I've topped out at 36 so far).  Buy a pet python (the wife is likely to torpedo that one).  Learn to shoot well enough to snipe from 700 yards.  Learn to spearfish, and try that catfishing-by-hand thing.

And have sex on a theme park ride.  And on the beach.  And in the snow.  There's lots of sex stuff on there.  Ideally, I could do all of it without getting arrested (so far, so good).

JB

For what its worth, I tend to differentiate between a "bucket list" and genuine life goals.  A bucket list is a bunch of semi-ridiculous, somewhat dangerous conquests or unnecessary skills I'd like to complete before I reside on the wrong side of the dirt ... just to say I've done them.  They'd be cool to do.  They'll give me interesting experiences.  But, they won't make my quality of life much better.  I probably won't get to all of them.  And, I'd probably be happy enough having done half of them before I assume room temperature.  They're one-time events or semi-unnecessary skills, not a long-term plan for my life.


Life goals are more genuine.  They're things that I not only would like to do, but they're things I need to get done to live the life I'd like to.  Pay off debts.  Have a house built to my specifications.  Be a good husband/ father.  Buy things with cash.  Live on a budget.  Own my house outright.  Plan for retirement.  Run my own business.  Tithe.  Give generously.  For that kind of thing ... I have a 5, 10, and 25 year plan to get where I'd like to be.

Those aren't bucket list ideas ... they're goals that I ought to work toward every day.  If I'm off-track, I need to refocus.  I don't need to work toward alligator-wresting everyday ... and, if I'm off-track, it'll wait.

JB

Well said, Jack. I like your perspective on this. Gives me a lot to reevaluate about my list--especially making it more of a "to do" and less of a "want to" list.
I have a lot of similar goals with debts, or lack thereof, family, and giving. Luckily, although both natural spenders, my wife and I decided to not be like the majority of society and opt out of debt. We're on a plan to be debt free (except the house) by 26.

Now that is something I'd like to see. Probably involves killing something....

I want to see all 50 states.  I have seen 38.  I think the dream began in me at seven when we took a Winnebago camper family trip to Canada.  My wife and I decided a few years ago that we would take a big trip as a couple on our respective zero birthdays.  There is more to the story, but for my next big one I will visit #39 and #40 as part of the trek.  Hawaii and Alaska trips will be part of the next two (Hawaii for her, Alaska for me).  It may not be a headliner, but it is part of my list...and one I have given myself about 15 years to finish.

I realize this may not sound like a "manly" item.  However, I connect this dream with my father.  He took us on that big adventure to Canada.  The next trip we take connects with an old adventure of my father.  And finally, he was stationed in Alaska in the 50s and he spoke well of the Territory (as it was then).  I know he would like this quest of mine.  So, in that sense it is "manly".  I will ponder this question more.

If Alaska isn't manly, I'm not sure what state would be! Definitely on my list as well. I'd love to just breathe the freedom there!
...and fish and kill a bear and gold mine and...

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