I graduated high school last June. I wanted to focus on school until then, so after i graduated I went to find just a entry level job in town. I am having trouble getting my license but there are plenty of places within walking distance. So I got a job at Wendy's in October. I have had social anxiety for years in school, but I managed it enough to pass. I got hired at Wendy's and I had to deal with all these people yelling at me and it made me very anxious. I was getting nausea during working it was that bad. I did have a job during summer but it was with people I knew for years and it was much less hectic. I was unprepared for working at fast food. So one day I just didn't show up to work and I was very relieved that I didn't have to work there anymore. But now it's March and I still can't find a different job. I am fearful that I will not be able to handle anything in a new job. I have basically just given up and isolated myself most days. I don't want to be a loser forever, but I feel like I will fail for the rest of my life.

Views: 158

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

a) You should talk to a pro about this.

b) There are plenty of jobs that are a good fit for introverts, people with social anxiety, misanthrops, people who like to be alone, etc.

c) You feel overwhelmed right now but everything will be okay. Strongly consider point a) for actual help.

This sounds like a problem a psychotherapist could help with.

Sometimes you can solve it by talking it out with the peanut gallery, but... this isn't a mild case.  It got you unemployed.  It needs addressing.

Well, you ended up in what seems to me to be one of the worst possible jobs for someone with social anxiety.  Unfortunately, it is also one of the easy jobs to actually get.

I agree with looking for help dealing with the anxiety. 

Don't feel like a loser and isolate yourself over one (really) difficult situation.  You said that you have had other jobs that worked out okay.  So keep that in mind.  It is a difficult challenge you have to deal with, but it doesn't make you a failure or loser.

As people have said you need to talk to a pshyc for this.  But also you may find a profession that is less people crowded.  Many professions give you office environments where you can get to know a few people and just deal with them.  IT networking is one that comes to mind or programming.  Both of those will give a structured interaction with reduced emphasis on people. 

So you may have to grind college for a few years to get to a good career point for you.

1. You might not see this, but you are way to young for any of those things to be a problem. And not succeeding at one job, doesn't mean you couldn't at another. I once got fired within week one at a job :D

2. What is it what you want to do for work? The working life isn´t a sprint it is a marathon which means you should be well prepared for it and have a plan how to get to the end without wasting yourself before. I imagine it is though to get a job as a untrained worker so is a apprenticeship or something like that a option for you?

Its inevitable that you will have to deal with people if you are just getting out of highschool and want a job. Understand that in this world, no one can succeed by themselves, you have to socialize in order to have a happy life (its a necessary condition of life). Why get anxious about something that you have 0 control over. Youre not a loser, why would you even think that.

I disagree, i dont think you need to talk to a pro about this. You have to relax, keep calm and carry on. Pull yourself up by your bootstraps and get out there. "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living" by Dale Carnegie, get the book, read it twice.

Nobody likes being yelled at and yes fast food server is a stressful job. But I think you should go back to a similar job. Drop the "social anxiety" identity. I sometimes think your entire generation is being hobbled with these quasipsychological labels. You're shy, probably introverted, and probably were never put in a position growing up to challenge it therefore facing it for the first time as an adult is scary. I have rarely met anyone who was naturally comfortable working in a job like a server in a fast food chain but it is a useful experience to obtain and no you won't get it from a book or counsellor. Anxiety won't kill you but trying to avoid it will only make it worse.

See you could also find a profession which is less crowded and less social. You can also apply for trainee post where you would be in learning phase and no responsibility. But yeah, do keep finding for another job too because why settle for less when you know, you deserve much better.

This generation is definitely different than the one I grew up in.  I had a job from the time I was 12 -- mowing lawns, delivering papers, dishwasher, waiter, Dominos' pizza driver (back when they had the 30 minute guarantee -- that was fun!), Autozone warehouse grunt.  Seems to me kids don't have the same opportunities as we did.

I know that wasn't helpful but I needed to say it.  Lots of good advice here though.  Good luck, chief.

RSS

Latest Activity

Adam Keynes commented on Bruce Uall's group The Shirtless Man
"Recently I was hired to do some work of a rooftop, some painting, cleaning and the like. I arrived the day in which I had agreed to start with the owner and put on some working clothes but no shirt. He didn't say much and showed me to the…"
3 hours ago
Caberry replied to MMA_Erik's discussion Hello Gents :)
"Hello @Erik nice to have a chat with you here. I am also a newbie here. :)"
6 hours ago
Liam Strain replied to Naveen's discussion I am searching the AOM Article about William James / Fake it till you make it
"I found this one, on William James:http://www.artofmanliness.com/2017/01/14/manvotional-3-maxims-habit-action/ And Brett did an article and video on "Fake it till you make…"
8 hours ago
Jay D replied to Portnoy's discussion Integrity
"It is not about deadlines it is about the question how we treat a person and the capitalistic logic expects us to treat them based on what their value for the company is and to increase the value they generate for said company. The big problem with…"
15 hours ago
derick bean posted a status
16 hours ago
Naveen posted a discussion

I am searching the AOM Article about William James / Fake it till you make it

Hi,There is a terrific article about William James Psychology and his concept about "Fake it till you make it". Act as if you already are confident. I cant find on google, here nowwhere. Anybody has read it lately?Best regards,NaveenSee More
17 hours ago
Gentleman Engineer replied to Gentleman Engineer's discussion Barcelona About October
"Pleasure would state that said tense would lack aught of the prototypical. Fortune would state also that there would exist a certain settlement about the State of the Sole Star which would exist apropos for such an adjective."
20 hours ago
Braeden 2.0 replied to Gentleman Engineer's discussion Barcelona About October
"I'm very good at impersonating other people's writing or speaking."
21 hours ago

© 2017   Created by Brett McKay.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service