Well first off, every good gentleman needs to be able to impress a lady. Now, as i'm sure you've guessed, this post is to throw out suggestions and ideas for valentines day. So go ahead!
And secondly, I need some advice. My girlfriend loves plays, musicals and films. It seemed like a good idea for me to surprise her with a booking for the two of us to go and see a play, however I'm a little clueless about the whole thing. I live in London, and she's worth spending lots of money on, though I don't get much in the way of income. Any advice would be appreciated, thanks :)
Try this. Do NOT celebrate it.
If you need one day out of the year to buy flowers, give a card, or otherwise excess your affection and love. You do not deserve to have a mate. You should be romancing your loved one randomly throughout the year.
I object to the commercialization of that day. Why pay ghastly amounts for flowers on that day? What does it say other then you can pay attention to marketing?
I do think you must romance your love. I simply take THAT day off from trying to impress. Really what is romantic about having the waiters trying to get you out of your booth for the next sappy love couple? What is so wonderful about that day? Take a quite night in and cuddle but don’t buy into this day.
Every day is a good day to romance your loved one. Take that day off to not cheapen the times you do.
I agree with you wholeheartedly, David. However, I feel the same way about flowers.
Logically, the gift of flowers makes no practical sense; they're ridiculously expensive, and they rot a few of days later. Yet, I continue to buy them for my wife. Why? Because she enjoys them. It makes her feel special that I thought of her and decided to bring her flowers. It makes her feel cherished when she shows them to friends. Likewise, how's she going to feel when her friends ask her what I did for her on Valentine's Day, and she has to tell them, "Oh, nothing. He doesn't celebrate it because it's just a commercial marketing thing." That'd just make me look like a douche, and it'd make her feel like she's less important to me than a meaningless "stand" that I take against the establishment.
Yes, Valentine's Day is ridiculous on most levels. So ignore that aspect of it. Pretend that it's just another day that you want to use to make your girl feel special and cherished. The holiday may be artificial, but your relationship isn't. Ironically, you're making a bigger deal about Valentine's Day by not celebrating it than you would be by just taking her out for a date.
My wife and I do not celebrate valentines day. We both kind of think its a little over the top and useless. Just enjoy each other every day. So on valentines day i think we are going to white castle with some frinds.
To answer your question better. Do go out to a play or whatever but don't do it on valentines day. Do it when the prices are good and the eateries are not packed. Plan a quiet night at home for that day. If you are sexually active, take the night off from that. It has become kind of expected on that night. You would be even more stunning if you did something un-guy like, and unexpected. Make her a nice meal and watch a good move and surprise her with the tickets so she will know when and what for that extra great date, just don't focus on the calender date.
Fastest route to ending a relationship. That may work with a spouse, where you can make decisions together and have years to decide what works best, but if you're still dating, it's a chance I wouldn't take.
Besides, I thought V-Day was one of the reasons for dating. It can be a great night. Don't waste it.
forget all of those anti-valentines day people. no matter what she says, no matter how adamant she is that she does not want to make a big deal out of it... SHE'S LYING. even if she's just lying to herself because she doesn't expect anything from you. she wants some sort of recognition of your love for her on feb 14th and you should be happy to endulge.
i am one cheap SOB, so the price argument works on me the other 364 days a year. do something nice for her on V-day even if it costs you a bit extra because of it. if money is really tight, there are plenty of cheap ways to get around an expensive day. such as...
1) mail her a poem, picture, or a card (or all 3) even if you live together. everyone loves getting mail.
2) email her cutsie stuff throughout the day
3) text her a picture of flowers
4) gotta get her chocolate. no way around that. even if it's just all pink and red M&Ms
5) get her real flowers, too. find out what her favorite flower is (it isn't automatically roses)
--> Potted flowers last longer and are a 'living symbol of your ongoing love', which will justify spending more. potted plants dont have as much of a february markup either. orchids are good. hell, even a cactus
6) make her favorite dinner
7) make a dessert too! soufle, lava brownies, cupcakes with hearts on em - anything extra rich and decadent
8) give her a massage - even a hand massage while watching a movie
9) watch something SHE wants to watch
10) sweet, sweet lovin'
all 10 of those things can be done for around $25 if you really want. she'll be happy all day. you're not broke. win-win. you can also bump it up and spend more. up to you.
I think by combining the comments here is the best way to celebrate V-day. On the one side, yes, Valentine's Day is overrated and basically is the retail/restaurant businesses' way of sucking money out of guys who feel guilty for being a little too lazy in the romance dept during the year much like how Mother's Day is these businesses' way of sucking money out of sons and husbands for being lazy in that dept.
And on the other, although you don't want to be contributing to the consumer culture's bottomless appetite for your money, you can't exactly just ignore your girl on "the most romantic day of the year" either.
Combine them. Don't waste your money on some overpriced "Valentine's Day dinner" or some mass-produced heart-shaped chocolate. But Do spend your time and money on some act that shows your love how you feel. Be original. Make her a valentine. Take her to somewhere that is special to the two of you like a favourite park or something. Maybe pretend to be tourists for a day and take in some of London's sights. Go back and repeat your first day or rent your first movie.
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