Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Michael on November 6, 2012 at 1:08am

Dude, you're in Fort Worth.  There's plenty to do.  Go to the old stockyards, its got Billy Bob's and Joe T Garcia's along with a great night life.  Just south is Downtown, another great place to hang out.  West of down town is the Cultural District if you need a more 'yuppie' atmosphere.

You're just 45 minutes from Dallas (not that it's that great of a place, but there's options there too). Very close to a bunch of fun small towns, lots of man made lakes with fishing and boating.  A few hours from San Antonio, Austin, Houston, Shreveport, Winstar Casino (may as well count as a city).

There is a group for all interests with organized activities in the city.  Just look it up.

Get a bicycle and hit the Trinity Trails. Get a gun and go shoot.  Literally anywhere.  It is Texas.

You got no excuses in Fort Worth.

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Permalink Reply by Rick Shelton on November 6, 2012 at 11:45am

Love Risky's BBQ!

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Permalink Reply by Michael on December 2, 2012 at 9:17pm

This time of year in the metroplex, go check out a neighborhood called "Interlochen" in Arlington.

Great little neighborhood at christmas time.  Lots of well planned and very well resourced christmas displays.

Worth taking a girl or your family.  About mid December is when most people have their lights set up.

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Permalink Reply by Rob on November 6, 2012 at 1:53am

>>And it's making my depression worse

Buddy, if you've got depression, and I suspect you do because you say it's "worse" which implies that you've had the blues for a while, then you've got a worse problem on your plate than no friends and nothing to do.

>>I'm a bump on a log. Turd in the punch bowl. I suck.

How is your self-esteem doing?

I suspect that's the real problem, Bud.

If you have happiness that comes from within, if you take delight in running your own business and working towards a goal (regardless of outcome), then you would be the kind of person who makes people feel good and whom they would value as a friend or lover. Work on that first, friend, and then friends will come to you easily. "Like attracts like"--when you become the kind of person people want as a friend, then the kind of people that you would want as friends will be attracted to you.

If you are needy for external people, places, and things to make you feel good, then that's a problem, and other people are not going to want your problem to become their problem.

Unless you're an orphan you've probably got someone, somewhere in the world, who cares about you, and when you're feeling down, make a point to call someone. Maybe there's an elder in your family whose spirits would be lifted if you called, and then you can feel good about it too. If you really, truly are alone in the world, then set a strong intention to make a few friends, WITHOUT "attachments" (unrealistic expectations--wanting more than the Kosmos will give you). Don't force the issue, just go with the flow. Internet pals are fine; time and space are just concepts. Appreciate them, and feel as warm and positive thoughts about them and your interactions with them as you can.

Raise your empathy level, even with just strangers you see. Wish the barista happiness in life. Tell someone else he's doing a great job. Wherever you see strangers, sincerely wish them good lives. When you see someone hurting, tell him or her you care.

I suggest you take a couple breaks during the day, every day, to get some sunshine and fresh air. Your body needs sunshine to help decide when to make hormones such as melatonin and seratonin that regulate your mood.

Every evening, step out for a few moments, feel the cool air on your skin, gaze up at the stars, and find beauty wherever you look. Then whisper blessings into the wind and let them scatter to the ends of the earth.

I hope that your life-path takes you to a place where you can reach your highest potential and fulfil your highest purpose. Great success to you and your business. Give us an update how things are going, after you've thought it over and taken that first step. Cheers.

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Permalink Reply by Shane on November 6, 2012 at 1:55am

Victor man, we've had this conversation before.  You're into a lot of different things.  You need to find something you like, but you'll only do that by experiencing it.  If you can't find anything you absolutely want to do right now, start with what it is you're actually doing.  Go down to your local library and community center and find out what low cost/free classes are going on.

I've never been to a major city which didn't have at least one writing workshop or small business class happening at a community center or library.  They're usually pretty cheap and last only a few weeks for a night a week.  You won't be spending a lot of time or money investing in it if you decide it's not for you.  You'll meet new people, local people who you'll already have something in common.

If you don't want to mix business and pleasure, still go down and check out the classes.  There's usually a pretty good choice, from cooking to martial arts.  Just pick something off the list and do it.  Even if it's not for you, that weekend flower arranging class might come in handy some day.  And besides, you need to take First Aid/CPR.

Local Paper

Library

Craig's List

Botanical Garden (Tai Chi in the Garden? F uck yeah)

Small Business Center  (First month is free)

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Permalink Reply by Michael on November 6, 2012 at 10:34am

Ditto.  Fort Worth Public library system is one of the best.  In addition to the Botanic Gardens (which contains a the serene Japanese Gardens) in the cultural district, there are several art museums which cater to different genres/preferences, all with free exhibits.  Right next to the museums is the Community Arts Center, where I'm sure you could find writing clinics.

 

 

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Permalink Reply by Victor E. Franklin on November 7, 2012 at 6:05pm

Sometimes I just can't find the motivation to do it.  Like today, I know I had something to do, but I just had no push to do it.  I need to find a motivation, a driver, a fire.  I'll look into writer's workshops, and other things like that.  Maybe just getting outta the house will help.  Thanks.

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Permalink Reply by Michael on November 7, 2012 at 11:19pm

Just do it.  Once your out and away from the distractions at home, motivation comes naturally.

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Permalink Reply by Robecru on November 9, 2012 at 6:35pm

Definitely...leave the house.  Sometimes I feel like my house and family suck me in the void of nothingness, where I don't feel like doing anything.  Basically, I like feeling productive.  So I keep my planner and write down everything I need and want to do during the week and day.  Include everything, even TV/movie/video game time.  

Also, I started working out again, with a goal.  Now that goal is probably different than 99% of the population but its still something for me to work towards.  Also, right now you're not attached (no wife, kids, etc) so you have full opportunity to work on YOU.  I wish I had done that when I was single.  If I could be single over again I would do a lot of things differently (like study linguistics, lift weights, learn another language, etc).  If I had, I might have been a 380 lb weight lifting linguist by now. :)  But I didn't...so I'm in my 40's and just NOW "starting" my life.  I've been where you are for 30 years now.  So, get out of the house, see where you can help your fellow man and reflect on how you are/where you want to be...then research and work towards it.  Best wishes Vic! 

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Permalink Reply by Dave on November 6, 2012 at 2:31am

This problem can be easily solved! 

Just write out a massive list of all the shit you've wanted to learn since you were a kid. Write down all the moments you've seen a movie and thought "Shit it'd be cool to do that"- then dedicate yourself to learning those skills one at a time.

I remember being in your situation a few years ago. Had no friends, was pretty reclusive but wanted to be social, had nothing to talk about cos I didn't do anything but that all started to change when I started doing shit I wanted to discover and explore. Like boxing, capoeria, Krav Maga, learning Improv Comedy, Chinese calligraphy, salsa and tango, even joining the army reserve then backpacking around South America and SE Asia. I'm happy I did all that. It's changed my reality.

You know the life you've always dreamt of? Well it can be yours buddy :) Maybe not tomorrow, or next week, or for a long while. Don't think about that though. Just take your first step. Trust the process of taking one step at a time. After taking 2000 steps you've walked a kilometre.Change your reality through actions. 

Keep us posted :)

PS. Not being able to meet people cos you don't work a regular job is a pretty lame excuse. But you know that already ;)

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Permalink Reply by Claude on November 6, 2012 at 3:22pm

You're the Dos Equis guy!  Inspirational.

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Permalink Reply by Damien Guerrero (Kicking Bear) on November 6, 2012 at 4:09pm

"Just write out a massive list of all the s*** you've wanted to learn since you were a kid. Write down all the moments you've seen a movie and thought "S*** it'd be cool to do that"

  That is an awesome idea. I am constantly bored and I have 4 hobbies. I am also diagnosed as being borderline hyperactive. I can already think of 20 things off hand but
first, I am going bull riding.

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