Hello again gents,
So I've found myself in a bit of a pickle and I'm not too certain how to go about dealing with it.
So the back story is I was in a relationship for going on six years, two of which I was married to this lady. Well a few months ago the relationship started dying (I'm sure there's reasons linked to living together full time) and it turned into a friendship/ room mate type of deal. Around a month ago we mutually decided it wasn't working and we started the legal separation process. Now there is absolutely no chance of this marriage working out as honestly this has been a recurring event throughout the entire relationship and I'm personally done living that kind of life.
Since we separated my life actually got better, I was allowed to be myself again and that really opened up the road to personal progress.
So here comes the dilemma... Recently a new lady started at work and I have taken quite the liking to her, she has an extraordinary personality and I feel such a strong connection to her. I have absolutely no idea if she is interested in me at all and I don't have a clue as how to find out, you know six years not even being interested in other women then all of a sudden this happens. I was intending on asking her if she would like to go for coffee this weekend today but I bailed hard on that when in passing she said she wouldn't get involved with someone she works with. I guess what I am asking is first of do you gents think the women who say 'I couldn't get involved with someone I work with' can be converted because personally I don't believe the whole not trying with work colleagues because just because you work with them doesn't mean things can't work out. Secondly how should I go about finding out if she is interested in me at all?
Thanks in advance gents,
I'm super confused, I straight out told her I wanted to take her out and basically got nothing back from that I see her at work tomorrow and I swear if she once says 'I want to go out but I don't know anyone to go with' I'm going to be like what the hell I've been telling you since you got here I wanted to take you out! lol I don't know if shes playing hard to get or is just one confusing woman I just have absolutely no clue anymore.
Tough times don't last -- tough people do.
If you feel you'd like to, reconnect with your wife. Trust me, if it works well, you'd be surprised and happy.
I've been in your situation many times (without marriage), being in a committed relationship that was getting boring, then I come across a new lady that happens to somehow steal attraction from me. We're at the crossroads, mon ami. Things have turned around a couple times: a spark reignites with the girlfriend and the new lady becomes a great friend... or it can all go to Hell. Can we really know for certain how this will play out for you? I say no.
Take or disregard from this what you will. However, the timeless advice I can give you for love-business is to listen to your heart but trust your gut. Listen to your heart, but trust your gut.
Alright fellas, here's an update (yeah I'm slow at making things move forward I know)
So I got pretty ballsy for me today, we were chatting like usual talking about work stuff such as shift schedules and such and were talking about how we prefer opening shift because you then have the rest of the day to do something and she mentioned she doesn't usually do anything but go home and sleep. So I replied with 'Do you play pool?' Yeah random huh anyway she said she does just for fun and asked if I do and we talked about that for a couple seconds then I said 'So, you, me, pool, beer, yes?' and she said yes and asked where so I said I would look it up and get back to her tomorrow so it looks like I finally got her to go out with me lol so that's a good thing but now what the heck do I do! I was actually more so surprised that she said yes.
That's how its done! Keep it up while on the date and let us know how things go.
Try frame the evening more towards "date" rather than "hanging out". The pool and beers are really just a vehicle to get to know the lady in a romantic light. Be flirty and be responsive to her being flirty.
You could always help her with her form...girls love that stuff.
Honestly, big ups to you on scoring the date!