Looking for some advice, or similar experiences from others here.  Sorry for the cheesy content.

Just a little background, some of my friends are trying to set me and another friend of mine up. She's a very nice girl and I enjoy hanging out with her, but I just don't feel attracted to her in a romantic way.  At first I didn't do much about it, thinking that they would eventually get the point that I wasn't interested (I really didn't think that she had any feelings either).  Now it's to the point that she wants to hang out just together, and it seems like she may actually have feelings toward me (I've been told that I'm a very oblivious person in that way).  Obviously it's nothing too far yet, but I was wondering if you all had some advice on how I can send the message that I want nothing more than friendship in a gentlemanly way.

I've thought about just being straightforward and saying it how it is, but that doesn't seem like the best course of action.  The part that makes it more difficult is that she is part my closer group of friends, so I see her quite often. 

Thanks all.

      

Views: 142

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

The sooner you handle it, the easier it will be. Make sure she does have feelings for you first though. You don't want to make an ass of yourself.

I think most men are in the exact opposite problem.

Tell your friends how you feel. Also, tell them, thank you for their help, but please stop.

After I got married, I found out that I'd gone on many "dates" that I didn't realize were dates.
I wouldn't worry about it. Be kind, be honest, don't lead anyone on, but don't worry about declaring any relationship. Turns out I married one woman that started as a friend... and she thought a first few encounters were "dates" as well.
I laugh with my female friends now about our "dates" that I didn't recognize as such. We weren't right, they moved on, so did I. Most of them have since found and married other guys.
Don't be so uptight. Like I said : Be kind, be honest, don't lead anyone on, but beyond that don't worry. Celebrate the fact that you have female friends! You'll probably find "the one" because of your relationship with them.

RSS

Latest Activity

Drew posted a discussion

Dealing with a depressing job

Hi all,I'm looking for some advice on a work issue. Basically my job is getting me down, some days I feel ok, others I feel down and dread going in.I've ended up working in a hotel and mostly night shift. The nature of the work doesn't bother me, other than it's not what I trained for (I have a degree in law). What's bothering me is the fact that while I live with my fiancee, she works a 9-5 and I have to do 5 nights a week most days. This means we're like passing ships and I don't get to see…See More
26 minutes ago
Nature of a Man replied to Lumberjoe's discussion What happens when Islamic sexism meets Icelandic feminism / gender equality? Let's find out! in the group The Great Debate
"They're won't be any war, and the average fat lazy white American who can't be bothered to get up from the sofa would sell his daughter to be raped by black men before he'd risk his ass dying in a war anyway.Truth is the Founding…"
1 hour ago
Pale Horse replied to Lumberjoe's discussion What happens when Islamic sexism meets Icelandic feminism / gender equality? Let's find out! in the group The Great Debate
"The Emperor feels threatened by Duke Leto Atreides, so he conspires with another house to take him out. Emperor gives Atreides stewardship of a hostile planet to corner him. Emperor's forces in disguise wipe out most of the Atreides house, but…"
1 hour ago
Charles Dodd replied to Sir's discussion Loneliness
1 hour ago
Charles Dodd replied to Pale Horse's discussion Best Methods for Cutting Down on Sweets
"Sounds good. Glad I could help. By the way, I have type 2 diabetes in my family as well. I mentioned the Mediterranean Diet in my previous post: It's rated as good for warding off diabetes. Of course, it's also recognized as a successful,…"
1 hour ago
Shane replied to Lumberjoe's discussion What happens when Islamic sexism meets Icelandic feminism / gender equality? Let's find out! in the group The Great Debate
"Gimme the basic gestalt."
1 hour ago
Sir replied to Pale Horse's discussion Best Methods for Cutting Down on Sweets
"I was trying to be nice."
1 hour ago
Pale Horse replied to Lumberjoe's discussion What happens when Islamic sexism meets Icelandic feminism / gender equality? Let's find out! in the group The Great Debate
"Daggumit, Shane, read Dune."
2 hours ago

© 2017   Created by Brett McKay.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service