Well, this is from 2009, and it looks like Jenks is probably long gone, but I am going to comment here to put this back on the front page. Some people may find it interesting. I do find it interesting as well, though I am blessedly untroubled by gender battles (muhahahaha, suckers!)
No, actually, this is kind of interesting. Certainly men and women are different in how the perceive and react to the world. I liked these paragraphs:
This critique of "masculinity" dramatically affected intimate relationships: women were encouraged to express their dissatisfaction with men's refusal to "share" their inner lives. Women complained of not being heard, of men disappearing after work to tinker in the garage or zone out in front of the TV. But such complaints assumed that men choose all of their behaviour.
I liked that part because "alone time" does seem to be a point of conflict between couples. However, being alone and focusing on a specific task (such as building a model or fixing something) is very good for the brain. That kind of focused attention helps revive our "psyche," though I hate using that word.
And this one:
The most famous of these studies, anthropologist Helen Fisher's Anatomy of Love, explains the evolutionary impetus for human tendencies in courtship, marriage, adultery, divorce and child rearing. Some of her findings are provocative: it seems that we are hard-wired for serial monogamy and must work hard to maintain pair-bonds; that highly orgasmic women enjoy an evolutionary advantage; and that flirtation among primates closely resembles the way young men and women in a bar show their sexual interest today.
I like that one because I'm not always for monogamy, and because I like primate research and what it can potentially tell us about ourselves.
And these bits, because a lot of men are silent about their emotions:
Moreover, in her description of our evolution, Fisher notes that males who could tolerate long periods of silence (waiting for animals while in hunt mode) survived to pass on their genes, thus genetically selecting to prefer "space".
What Could He Be Thinking?, by Michael Gurian, a consultant in neurobiology, takes this set of insights further. Gurian argues men's brains can actually feel invaded and overwhelmed by too much verbal processing of emotion, so that men's need to zone out or do something mechanical rather than emote is often not a rejection of their spouses, but a neural need.
Zoning out is important!
Getting back to the anthropologist Dr. Helen Fisher: I recognized her name because a woman online used to always go on about her and how interesting she thought she was. However, I've never found the time to check her out for some reason. But she does have a lot of talks on YouTube, if anyone is interested. Here's one I'll post, but without comment.
One thing I forgot to mention is that when we examine gender differences, one of the worst bad habits people have is to first recognize something (some behavior or inclination) and then second, jump to the conclusion that there must be something wrong with said behavior or inclination.
We should try to get beyond that.
People do that with all behavior from everyone. Behavior can change, though, but not personality so compromise is still needed on both parties in a couple.
The big issues with the laundry in Native Son's household are the different techniques and practices used by Native Son and Mrs. Son.