Art of Manliness

How can I ask a girl this?

I don't know if this has been answered already, but I guess I'll give it a try. This has been wandering around in my head way before I joined this site, but now that I'm here I can finally ask people that I can trust about this question.

Here's the gist: From what I've been reading about on the weather earlier, this week is bound for some nasty rains. And yes, I'm in a school. My biology teacher is relatively old and he knows several things about doing things the old-fashioned way and the use of common etiquette back in the day, and I've even read up on his so-called "etiquette books".

I guess you can say that I'm sort of working on the ways of becoming a true gentleman. I really don't like the school I go to. It's full of snobs and obnoxiously loud people who degrade the school property and write "F.U." all over the benches (quite like Catcher in the Rye), and people who happen to have a penchant for just being a total dork, honestly. There are plenty of nice people there at my school though, believe me.

But that's besides the point. The thing is, if I see a girl who usually walks home but forgot her umbrella, how can I ask her if I can walk her home, or something along those lines? I don't want it to come off as awkward or like, weird. I just want to be a nice guy here without sounding like a dip-stick. There's this girl that's been constantly catching my eye lately and my last class is right next to the parking lot, and we sometimes cross roads when I walk to the bike racks. She does have a car, so she does head to the parking lot. Let's say she didn't bring her umbrella or something, but I brought mine. How do I ask her if I can walk her to her car or something?

Thanks.

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Permalink Reply by John on March 7, 2013 at 1:19am

"The Girl Who Dated the School Shooter"?

Hmm, well - considering how there's about four months left in the school year, I think I can last four months without blowing a head gasket.

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Permalink Reply by Will on March 7, 2013 at 6:44am

Just to clarify: no ? mark, but it shouldn't sound like an order. I wouldn't say, "You should do this," unless it's clear there's humor in that remark. But you can tweak it as needed.

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Permalink Reply by John on March 7, 2013 at 7:07pm

Gotcha. Thanks Will.

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Permalink Reply by John on March 6, 2013 at 8:55pm

Can't reply to your comment for some odd reason, Shane - either the "reply" button's broken or I'm still getting accustomed to this site. Probably the latter.

Catcher in the Rye has effed-up my mind to the point where maybe I am just a suicidal maniac like Mark Chapman or Holden Caulfield, but then again the book was part of the school curriculum, so maybe it is government control.

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Permalink Reply by Shane on March 6, 2013 at 9:15pm

Mark David Chapman. Get ready to be known by three names.

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Permalink Reply by John on March 7, 2013 at 1:14am

I'm prepared. Probably a good time to start thinking about a file cabinet for all of my aliases...

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Permalink Reply by William W. How on March 7, 2013 at 8:41pm

There's a small insurance company on the same floor as I work on. The boss there carries an umbrella even on sunny days.

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Permalink Reply by Erg on March 11, 2013 at 10:03pm

Don't white knight it. Like any other human being, if you are in the situation just offer. But don't use it as an in to ask her out. If you like her, just ask her out. You are way to nervous and will never be successful with any stratagem unless you are more confident and less awkward. And how do I know you are awkward? Because you are so nervous!

Also, the important thing to remember about politeness and etiquette and being a gentleman is that a true gentleman does his best to make everyone feel comfortable. To the extent old etiquette books run counter to that, and since they come from a different time and culture, they might.