I've got a question about the kinds of clothes worn around the house.
I remember my old grandfather would always wear trousers and a collared shirt. He did that until the day he died, which was just shy of 100. I, on the other hand, seem to go about the house in either an old pair of jeans, or just my underwear. Sometimes I wear nothing at all!
This is not a question I'd have envisioned myself asking, but I notice since starting to carry a hankie, pocket knife, always wearing suits/trousers and a shirt outside and generally trying to act like a gentleman I now feel a little immature when I'm at home.
Do you think the dress standards we try to cultivate outside should be continued in the home? Was there a reason our old relatives used to wear what they wore in the house? And what do you wear, if you don't mind my asking?
In the morning, jeans and t-shirt (or sweatshirt) because I have to take the dog out for a walk right after I get out of bed. When I come home from being out, I will sometimes remove my nice shirt and pants to save them from being covered in dog hair.
My wife does the same when she comes home ... almost immediately she changes into "house clothes", again to protect against the dog.
Around the home, I lounge around in my jeans and casual collared shirts or t-shirts. My wardrobe and wallet are not expansive enough to accomodate lounging around in nice, expensive clothing, getting them wrinkled and possibly dirty.
Outside of the home, I usually dress to a much higher standard. I even played basketball in a suit once.
Dressing up, at least a little, helps you feel a little more classy. And if you feel it, you're more likely to act that way and have a classy image. I read a self help book that talked about dressing up at home (this one was excessive to me, said to do a suit and tie in your down time), and one point was in case someone stopped by, or you decided to go out. After all, do you want to be surprised by someone seeing you in a stained, ratty t-shirt and torn sweat pants or something?
Almost didn't answer your second part. I'm in my underwear right now. But that's because I'm about to dress for work. Often, I'll have on a polo shirt and decent jeans after hours. T-shirts if it's too hot outside, but I hate being seen in something tattered, stained and tacky.
Usually I will put on jeans and continue to wear my undershirt (if after work and my whirt has sleeves). If it is the weekend, I usually just do a t-shirt and jeans, unless I am going somewhere.
I am usually barefoot, as I find socks to be confining; however, I will usually put on a clean pair of white cotton socks in the winter.
My work clothes are dockers, dress shirt & tie and nice shoes. When I come home, if it's really hot I will strip down to my undies & t-shirt to cool down. Later I'll put on some shorts. In the winter, I'll change into a sweatshirt, lounge pants, socks & slippers.
You should wear whatever is most comfortable for YOU in your own home. No guests? It is your domain. Unless you're constantly the source of uninvited parties, it's all good.
For me, I'm usually found in t-shirts, jeans, or (gasp!) Under Armour shorts and shirts around my house. Sweatshirts in the winter time, as well (even out of the house, on certain occasions! but it's a good-fitting sweatshirt, nothing sloppy). All that and a relaxed smile on my face, because I love the time I get to spend at home with my wife and daughter.
We live pretty remotely surrounded by several hundred acres of woodland, during the summer we may have some neighbors around the lake but otherwise we are the only full time residents so I feel pretty comfortable in boxers and a t-shirt whether lounging around the house or outside mowing our small patch of lawn.
I'm quite surprised by the majority of the responses you've received.
I would wear a tie to work as a baker and now that I work in a public office, I wear an official uniform. When I return home from work, I change into a casual button down shirt and casual pants (or shorts for the summer) unless I am transitioning directly into a chore like stacking wood which requires work jeans and work shirt. I find myself declining the T-shirt as I find myself more of an adult and have a three year old son who will learn from me how to dress well.
Perhaps not surprisingly, my attitude has improved and I feel better about myself since attempting to change upon returning home.
I would be interested in knowing if the AoM blog has posted anything on the subject. I'd say this is an opportunity to elevate the level of style in our lives to include the home as well as our public life.
Of course, there are times when extreme casual is necessary, but I try to limit those times as much as possible.
Some food food for thought. Home dress code has changed in part because we don't have visitors like we use to . Sure your buddy might drop by but he doesn't care if you're in your boxers and a t-shirt. I remember at my grandparents people were always dropping by to visit. Some were close friends and some were not. In either case it was a priority to make them feel welcome, offer them a libation or a cup of coffee. Few people do that anymore as we communicate by text, email and cell phone. We find ourselves in our own little world at home...and many dress accordingly.
Thank-you for bringing this up. I too have started to dress better when I leave the house. 95% of the time I wear a shirt and tie to work. When I leave the house to go to the store I have decided not to wear t shirts or old jeans. It is amazing how different you feel about yourself. Robert I agree with you about things remind you to be a gentleman. For me, it reminds you to be a gentleman or professional in the work place. I am going to start dressing better when I at home. T-shirts will be saved for doing dirty work, mowing grass and exercising. I mean really who are the most import people in your life-your family. Those people that you spend time with at home. To me it seems logical that if I act like a gentleman or professional when I wear better clothes when I am out. Stepping up my game at home makes sense. At the least I plan on wearing a polo and nice shorts.
I live and work at home in my jeans and t-shirt. I think in fact that starting to work from home has aversely affected my overall attire. I think that if you feel comfortable wearing a collared shirt and trousers around the home, then go for it, it certainly won't hurt you. I'm strongly considering doing the same.
"I think the temptation is to fit others, in this case women, into our framework. We tend to think "passive" is bad (I sure do), but my wife does not have "passive" as a bad word in her way of thinking. (Irresponsible,…"
"Thank you for the reply. I realize that different people are attracted to different people, but I'm just trying to get inside the head of people who are attracted to the type of woman who, on the surface, appears passive. Trying to…"