Hello Gents,  I was compelled to join this community after reading all the great advice and finding lots of shared experiences.   I grew up in Michigan then moved to Colorado about 20 years ago.  My wife and I married in 2000.  We moved back to Michigan in 2003 to be closer to family after my mom and grandma died within days of each other.  In 2004 we were both hired into the same office and had been working together since.  We started fostering our three kids in 2008.  We adopted them in 2010.  The kids are now 8 y-o (son), 7 y-o (daughter), 5 y-o (son).  My wife and I have started having trouble with our marriage over the last 4 months and have just started couseling which has been helpful.  My wife just lost her job in the office that we've been working in together for so long, so things at home have been stressful and things in the office have been awkward at best.  I've been trying to improve myself since our marriage hit the rocks, and I think that all of the great advice I've been finding will help.

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Hey Tim,
Welcome to AoM and I hope you can find some solid advice and understanding on here. Wow it sounds like your family is up against it right now. Especially tough when young 'uns need to be protected from what is going on. If you ever want to message me, go right ahead.

My wife and I worked together for over 10 years and that takes some patience. Now that we have separate jobs things are smoother. Over the years we've endured her loss of her career (it was a flaming train wreck) and like you, deaths of parents and siblings during all of it. Sometimes you can't catch a break, but always hold on to the chance for a better time in the future- don't give up. Remember this saying of Winston Churchill: "If you think you're going through hell- keep going."
Thanks Doug!

Tim, Hang in there with the marriage and family thing, it's worth it!  I admire your dedication to your role as husband and father.  My wife and I went through some rough times but have ended up with a stronger relationship as a result.  Men and women experience and think about things so differently and it takes a lot of effort to understand and communicate with each other sometimes.  When I began to really get that, and try to accept  and appreciate her way of thinking it helped a lot.  I also recommend a book by a guy named Gary Chapman called the 5 Love Languages. Keep up the good work!

Drew

Consider www.marriagemax.com The guys name is Mort Fertel and I think he's got something as marriage goes.  Makes sense to me anyway.  You might be able to find his book in your local public library or on-line -get used for pennies.

All the best to you both! 

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