Isn't "old fashioned" a part of what AoM is all about? Etiquette, manners, social skills, possibly even values. There have been some good discussions and posts about gratitude, so I'll bring up one more just in time for Thanksgiving.

I am proud of being "old fashioned" in many ways. This evening, I went to the store to buy a Thank You card. After playing dodge-em with rude "modern" people, I finally found the card section at the store. Then I had to dodge some more rude "modern" people until I could find the paltry selection. And the selection was not in one area, but scattered, so I had to hunt. (You know... if you want a good card, ask Helen Hunt. That's right, if you want a good card, go to Helen Hunt for it.)

Eventually, I found a card that was acceptable in my view to send to a man. It's amazing that there are so few Thank You cards in the first place. Worse, most of them are sappy or female-oriented. (How about AoM starting a greeting card line, so we don't have to deal with tacky or feminine cards? So many greeting cards are along the lines of, "Happy Birthday, now get naked", or insulting. Or both.) Anyway, does the lack of decent Thank You cards mean that men are expected to be ingrates? Not this little gray duck.

Does anyone else buy Thank You cards, or make them on their computer? Or is a verbal, textual or e-mail acknowledgment sufficient for you?

Views: 149

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

My husband and I are both verbal rather than cards about gratitude.

I'd say the fact you can only find mostly feminine or gushy cards is because it does tend to be something the women generally handle. I'm not implying that's the way it should be in the least.... but fits in nicely with a conversation I'm having with a gentleman under the Great Debate (sigh... I'll leave that one alone).

However, I think it's great that you show your gratitude no matter how you choose to do it. I see nothing innately feminine at all about you buying a card to show your gratitude. Good for you.
I like that idea. The card that I found in the greeting card aisle was blank inside (the others were embarrassing, or too simplistic; I can be simplistic by myself), but it took some effort.
Depends on shipping. Also, are you thankful enough to give gusto, or fine scotch?
That or a steak. I'll gladly accept steak as a Thank You.

So, a simple text message or e-mail is sufficient to show your gratitude, if you show it? I like Nathan and Ray's ideas because a physical sign of gratitude is classy, text is tacky.
Thanks for clarifying. I was hoping people did not accept the idea of routinely using text messages and the like. In the case of gratitude, I like doing it in person whenever possible.
I too like to thank others, but I normally do it via email, or in person. I do not choose to do it this way because I'm cheap or lazy (although my wife accuses me of both). I do it because I know that I prefer to not be given a thank you note. Do I throw it away after reading it? Do I do like my wife and save them for years only to have them stacked in drawers? I prefer a personal thank you or email.
I'm in the same boat. I get a Thank You card, I read it, and into the circle file it goes.
If i have the time i like to go and buy cards because i feel that it is more personel compared to sending a e-card.
Plus, some e-card sites will put your recipient, and you, on a mailing list. Then there's the risk of selling addresses to spammers, so you're doing a favor as well as doing something classy.
Good for you, Cowboy Bob. I'm a big proponent of the physical thank you card. I like to buy really simple blank cards. Although a stationery place sent me a box of what's called "correspondence cards" and I really enjoyed using them. I'll have to get some more. I think they're pretty manly-short, simple, and efficient.

Agreed on the crap-tastic nature of Hallmark cards. They all have male strippers or a monkey or that crabby old lady on the front. It's sad they don't make cards that appeal to men because card/letter writing has become a "feminine" activity.

The wife makes funny homemade cards that people really do hang onto forever. But she can get away with it because she's really funny and creative. My homemade cards just look like I was too cheap to buy a real card.

Email or text just doesn't cut it for me. I know people say it doesn't matter, but anyone can dash off an email in 5 minutes. Cards take a little work, a little effort, which really acknowledges to the person your true appreciation. I suppose phone calls are okay, but being thanked "in person" is sometimes a little awkward and I just generally hate talking on the phone. Speaking of which, that would be a good you hate talking on the phone? Seems like many men do.


Latest Activity

Elkster joined Bruce Uall's group

The Shirtless Man

Shirtlessness is the essence of manliness.
3 hours ago
Elkster updated their profile
3 hours ago
Carl Monster replied to RayRay's discussion Hair or Sex?
"Sex and wigs. It's fun, you should try it!"
3 hours ago
Carl Monster replied to Johann S.'s discussion "The Fear of Having a Son"
"Are you kind, honest fearless and confident? Kids watch what we do as much if not more than listen to our words. How we respond to things, even when we think they are not watching is what we are programming for. In the men's work I've…"
3 hours ago
Profile IconCHARATH SWAMINATHAN, Alan, Chris Noland and 4 more joined Art of Manliness
5 hours ago
Matt Eo replied to RayRay's discussion Hair or Sex?
"Work on having confidence in a bald or near-bald state and err on the side of good sex my friend.  Being a confident and bald young guy will set you apart from the dozens of other guys that hit on a woman in one night.  One of my closest…"
16 hours ago
Matt Eo replied to Leonardo McGrabe's discussion Swimwear in the US
"My college experience was about 12 years ago, but any dude wearing anything resembling tighty whities for any reason at any time was the subject of great humor and was either not getting laid or in the .1 percent of extremely fit and confident guys…"
16 hours ago
Native Son replied to John Smith's discussion Home Organization? I need help!
"Sounds like you're using the "Fields' Famous Filing System...based upon the Geological Theory of the Stratum.""

© 2016   Created by Brett McKay.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service