So I've been trying to kick the blues for about a year and at the same time return to the "roots" as prescribed here on AOM. Trying to figure out what makes me feel anxious and unhappy and realized a big part of that was Facebook. Between the obsessive checking for one of those "red notifications" (like hitting a meth pipe!), to comparing myself to other people's lives and accomplishments, to having over 300 "friends" of which about 30 I ever hung out with....had to get rid of it. Plus dealing with my ex's friend requests, messages, etc. Block her and I hear from her mom on facebook. So it had to go. Seems some other folks on AOM have gotten rid of their facebook for similar reasons. Sure I'll miss knowing what people are up to, and might be late to hearing about big events or getting invited to things, but figured if someone matters to me enough either I'll them or they'll call me. Or hell even email. Crazy as it sounds, facebook made me feel even more disconnected and lonely. My next step is getting rid of my smartphone. I find myself going to it addictivley when I get bored or have time to kill. Almost always unproductive. I'll miss being able to google information when I need it, the driving directions (standalone nav system replaces that), and internet radio. Todo lists are cool too but can be done on paper. Plus the phone sucks up so much battery. Think going back to a flip phone like the good ole days will let me focus on real-world things that really matter. Plus the battery life!! How many times I've been stranded without a phone because my smartphone dies so quickly, no matter how long I charge it at night or the morning and even with new battery.
Going to simplify the digital stuff so I can focus on the real world!!
Some of us have addictive behaviors that can only be controlled by abstaining completely from their influence on our lives. Abstention can be for a short time all the way up to a lifetime in order to escape the devastation these behaviors bring to one's life. Self-control may not be possible except for total severance from any participation in the activity. Call me a man who is weak, but I would rather admit my weakness, toss the behavior for ever, and then get on with living. For me, none of this can be done in solitary living but only in the midst of a band of brothers.
I am weak and that's why I'm getting rid of the phone. I know I'm blaming the tools but at the same time it's my weakness. Impulse control. I've also quit smoking cold turkey. I relized I couldn't have a beer and a few smokes...it would always transfer to a pack. Plus the smartphone has died so often and left me without access to it's main function on being a phone that it seems almost useless to have all the other crap. I long for the days when the phone was just a phone...and text messaging. When we go out it seems like everyone takes a ton of "smartphone breaks" of looking at their phones when we should all be conversing instead.
I am so old cause this makes me hang my head.
"I long for the days when the phone was just a phone...and text messaging".
Cause when I think of longing for days it was when we left the house without cellphones at all. There was no such thing as a text message. Hell, we didn't even have caller ID
I often thing of this as well. I wonder if we really need all of these "tools" that society says that we need. Many times I get frustrated with them and want to get rid of them.
Maybe I'll become a Luddite.
you mean the days when if you didn't answer then you were busy or not at home and they called you back later. the days when you were either reached at work or at home and if you were not in one of those places, well tough cookies for them. in many ways i miss them days too.
Oh yeah housephones...holy hell that was wild. I'm 26 so watching all thie change is a bit distressing. I don't even know how to use twitter, tumblr or pintrest. Nor do I want to.
I know what twitter is, just dont use it. never heard of the other two.
I signed up to Tumblr a few weeks ago. It asks for your age...as soon as you go over 29, it says "x years young" rather than "x years old". Bah.
Well ya'll got me thinking. I'm a 50 year old divorced guy and I'm sorting thru what consumes most of my time when not working. I do Facebook but have a regular flip phone. I have a regular TV that I don't often watch. I do read an hour or so a day, ( history, classics and such). No wife, kids or pets to keep me entertained around the house.
I must admit that I spend 4 or 5 hours a day on the computer. Maybe an hour of that is work related but the rest is just entertainment and info searching. Now I've gotta decide if that is too much computer time and if I should replace it with something else! Go figure!
I deleted my FB about 9 months ago. It was liberating to say the least. My wife said I "wasn't in the loop with other people and their news". All I could think, was that I wasn't up their digital butts anymore. I loved not having it. Dedicated time to my blog instead. Didn't have to worry about the 300+ friends anymore. Then my wife told me how hurt she was that I just didn't exist with her through FB anymore. So I have another one. With less than 100 friends. I still hate it. I'm giving it a few more months before I get rid of it again. Hopefully.
You were thankful about not being up people's digital butts by going online and keeping up a blog?
Am I the only one that reads this as a text book definition of irony?