So I've been trying to kick the blues for about a year and at the same time return to the "roots" as prescribed here on AOM. Trying to figure out what makes me feel anxious and unhappy and realized a big part of that was Facebook. Between the obsessive checking for one of those "red notifications" (like hitting a meth pipe!), to comparing myself to other people's lives and accomplishments, to having over 300 "friends" of which about 30 I ever hung out with....had to get rid of it. Plus dealing with my ex's friend requests, messages, etc. Block her and I hear from her mom on facebook. So it had to go. Seems some other folks on AOM have gotten rid of their facebook for similar reasons. Sure I'll miss knowing what people are up to, and might be late to hearing about big events or getting invited to things, but figured if someone matters to me enough either I'll them or they'll call me. Or hell even email. Crazy as it sounds, facebook made me feel even more disconnected and lonely. My next step is getting rid of my smartphone. I find myself going to it addictivley when I get bored or have time to kill. Almost always unproductive. I'll miss being able to google information when I need it, the driving directions (standalone nav system replaces that), and internet radio. Todo lists are cool too but can be done on paper. Plus the phone sucks up so much battery. Think going back to a flip phone like the good ole days will let me focus on real-world things that really matter. Plus the battery life!! How many times I've been stranded without a phone because my smartphone dies so quickly, no matter how long I charge it at night or the morning and even with new battery.
Going to simplify the digital stuff so I can focus on the real world!!
A big step, and for you a good step.
Sent from my black, rotary dial vintage 1949 with two party lines telephone.
I would rethink that smartphone thing.
What you need to work on is your reliance and how you rely on tools rather than just throwing out the tool. As you stated, the smartphone as a tool has many functions that a man can use daily. If you throw it out because you can't handle it, you didn't get a handle on yourself and that is what is most important
Shieldes is right. I have an Android phone but I didn't sign up for the data plan so I only use the net at home when connected to my wifi. I have the ability to get directions when I get my self turned around or a wreck shuts down the freeway (favorite Houston pastime). My phone also has facebook capability but I will never connect my account with my phone.
My smart phone has replaced my alarm clock because I can set a Monday-Friday alarm and other alarms the only occur once per month. There are many good things that smart phones allow or help you do.
Yeah. It would be much better if you learned to control yourself and keep this nonsense in perspective instead of just trashing it completely. Discipline is a tough lesson, but one worth learning.
But, if you can't manage to control yourself ... it is better to throw it out than to be consumed by it.
I agree. And with FB too, though it's an easy target and timewaster.
Just this weekend I had someone approach me downtown; "are you Carl?" she asked.
Turned out she ran the town business FB page and knew me from my comments.
We chatted warmly; I have a new friend! But more importantly, in case I get laid off I have a valuable new contact to network with for a job search.
FB is just a tool, it's up to us how we use it.
People can go on and on about exercising self control, when often the best way to exercise it is to get rid of the things that tend to sneak in and wrench it from you daily. I'm all for abandoning facebook and finding a productive substitute for the time you spent on there. I also support you getting rid of the smart phone. Replacing your smart phone with a bare-bones mobile phone will force you to be more mindful of the way you communicate. If you need the internet or email, you can sit down at a computer with purpose and use them there. The temptation to pull out a smart phone and use it in public for any number of reasons, (and closing yourself off from actual people and the physical world) is so strong, and I think it tends to be a crutch for people who can't stand waiting in line, sitting in a waiting room, or some other situation in which you might have to interact with people you don't know, or pay attention to the sometimes-mundane goings on in the world around you.
It's a poor workman who blames his tools.
Or perhaps a workman who realizes he's using the wrong tools.
I have tried Facebook twice and gotten rid of it both times. Good move there IMO.
On the smartphone thing, I think if it is causing issues, then dump it. I've considered the same thing. I have one for work but none for home.
I completely understand using a smartphone if your job demands it (in which case it is a tool), but our culture is getting to a place where everyone's got one for casual use (in which case it's a toy).
I completely understand using a smartphone computer if your job demands it (in which case it is a tool), but our culture is getting to a place where everyone's got one for casual use (in which case it's a toy).
How many other substitutions could be made?
Don't blame advances in technology for lack of personal responsibility.