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Escorting a Girl While on a Date?
Is it a good idea to offer a girl your arm while walking around on a date?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Jack Bauer on -
In short ... act like you're secure enough not to have to ask this question.
JB
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Permalink Reply by Michael D. Denny on -
I understand where you are coming from, I however don't trust that any particular person will necessarily follow your logic on the matter in the moment.
Well that is the good thing about it all. Advice is free, and I don't have anything to prove. Go with it, don't go with it. Won't change how my date is going to go Saturday evening.
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Permalink Reply by Michael D. Denny on
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haahaa. no. I do date outside of going to the ballet. We're having dinner at her place.
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Permalink Reply by Rebekah on -
However much I respect you, I have to recommend not escorting her to the bathroom in her own home. That's just too much.
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Permalink Reply by Michael D. Denny on
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Unless she is into that sort of thing.
But yea, I'll probably not be walking her to the commode.
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Permalink Reply by Mike M. on -
I don't think there's a hard and fast rule on this. If she's the kind of person who will be offended by the gesture or the kind will be offended that you didn't make it, then you're probably not missing much (besides a whole lot of whining and conflict) if things don't work out. For anyone else, just do what seems natural. If offering her your arm feels right, go for it. If she feels uncomfortable taking it, quietly let go. Just try to keep things warm and comfortable for both you.
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Permalink Reply by Experimental Wife on -
I've been married for three years and with the same man for nine. He offered me his arm on our first date. And he opened doors. We've been together ever since.
It turned out like small, "old-fashioned" gestures were a great way to communicate certain values we held and expectations for our relationship without actually having to discuss them later. We knew we were on the same page from day one.
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Permalink Reply by LShieldes on
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Not really, only because it is rather archaic. If I did, it would be in a very playful manner.
The idea on wanting to know if she is open to you touching her should have already been addressed with all of your other interactions. Does she sit close/lean in, or back. If close, put your hands partially close, does she lean in closer. While talking and sharing a joke, lightly touch her hand, does she move it away. When opening a door and letting her in a room, lightly touch the small of her back, and see how she responds and so forth.
If you are both connecting, you will both be finding every excuse to touch each other. At that point, if we were going somewhere, I would make a joke out of offering the arm and let her take it and see what she does when she has it.
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Permalink Reply by Red Garland on
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Do you mean just holding by the hands or arm-in-arm?
If the latter, I think in general it is a good idea - nothing makes you feel more like a gentleman and her like a lady. But it depends on the girl herself and how well you know each other - but I know most girls would love that. Being a gentleman is in a decline now and any sign of this almost forgotten art is for the most part welcome. As long as you do it in a way comfortable for you and for her - if you'll feel awkward offering her it she will, too, accepting. Make sure it comes off naturally.
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Permalink Reply by Sir Dylan on -
he's on it. I was confused how someone was describing a move earlier where you grab someones hand and put it in your pocket? i dont know.. but im in agreeance with the classic arm out, and let her decide how she will grasp it.
I've done this with a girl once and she gladly grabbed on, i presented it in a jokingly manner but at the same time it worked, she playfully embraced it and walked along with it. and i feel this is also a good way of surveying how they feel about you.
if she locks elbows with you, it may not be as intimate as if she were to embrace you with her hands more, or even reach over with the opposite hand on your upper arm, and connect more contact with her body and yours as you walk together. there are many variables in this one, and they all say different things.
Throwing your arm out is a classic gesture which has arguable been replaced by holding hands. If it's dead and old, i think it deserves a revival.
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