Hey there fellas,
I find myself in need to opinions on a matter involving an attempt to ask out a woman today. First some background. I'm a US college student studying abroad in the UK. Recently in my Latin class (classics is the degree of choice) I met a lovely Dutch girl. Anyways, onwards and forwards. Now, today after class several of us went together for a drink at a nearby pub. several hours later when leaving it was just her and I left, and we had a short conversation in front of the pub, and, as we parted, I rather awkwardly asked her if she was busy over the weekend (I know, it wasn't terribly direct). She said she was busy with field hockey all weekend, so I asked about next week to which she replied that she couldn't say, because she basically lives day to day since she's incredibly busy and only has a brief window of opportunity to do homework (being too lazy to do it in the morning and too tired after eleven at night). But she added as a sort of caveat that we'll probably see each other at other Latin get togethers. Then we parted ways. My question is, do you guys think it was a particularly skilled turn down? Or am I reading too much in to what was simply an honest statement about being unable to make plans very far ahead in the future? If you haven't already guessed, I don't do very well with the subtleties of social interaction.
Mine would be "Who cares".
Thanks for the replies everyone. It does occur to me now that I should have been more direct in my approach. Next time, I will be.
From what you have said I would not give up on asking this girl out. You said the two of you stayed until you were the only ones left from your group. If she didn't like you or she can't stand you then she would not have let that happen (of course unless she is a raging alcoholic who can't pry herself away from the bar). I would look up the schedule for the field hockey team and be sure you don't ask her out when they have a scheduled game. Then ask her out in a more direct manner.
I hope you'll get it, Bloom.
By the way, do you intend to follow Harold Bloom steps? =D
I can't say that I know much about Harold Bloom, sadly. Though it's rather coincidental we have the same last name! I'm interested in Classics, but I don't think that I could take it into a professional capacity. As we speak though I'm working on other plans, which are rather atypical when it comes to "careers". Making YouTube videos (of the educational variety) and writing. Though the writing still needs to be worked on substantially.
How about Edward Bloom? Always been one of my favorite Blooms.
This varies from region to region and person to person, but she could have stayed 'cause it's impolite to leave someone from a group alone. I certainly tried to stay with whoever was finishing his lunch/dinner/drink last when I went out with groups in my university years. I'm usually actually the last one to finish and appreciate the company. If were the girl and OP had just ordered another beer when the rest of the group left, I'd have stayed rather than let him chug his beer alone. (My etiquette books also say ladies on dates should order every course their dates order, rather than make the gentleman eat while she just sits there.) Ideally, if the last to finish is a man, another man will be the one to "keep company," but that's more than I expect unless the men claim to live by Woodhouse/Victorian standards.
But, yeah, OP, she may have been signaling interest, but she doesn't seem to have been signaling non-interest.
I probably could have phrased that better in the question explanation. We all left at the same time, but she and I were the last to pay our bills and thus were the last to actually leave the pub.
I usually wait the last one too. Unless if I'm really on a hurry or really don't want to stay with a certain person alone.
It's good to have people polite as you around.
Although I think that ordering the same course of the company too much. =D
Well played, sir. Well played.