"Words that count in life are not those spewed forth by skeptics and obfuscators. They are those words that have stood the test of time and still stand hundreds and thousands of years from when they were pinned. I will take those words over those of…"
Brawling like a man....some rules to live by.
The first and most important rule...Don't.
A manly man will find a way to avoid most physical confrontations. This is because he understands the fundamental rule that only one participant in a fight can possibly win. However, every participant has a likelihood of losing, whether it be on physical, egotistical, monetary, or criminal grounds. Modern law makes settling matters with fisticuffs an ill-advised activity. Even when you win a fight, you can lose in court.
Don't be afraid to tell the other guy "You know what, I am a p***y, so lemme buy you a drink and lets forget this whole thing".
That said, if you find yourself in a situation where a fight is inevitable, here are some points to ponder.
1. Preemptive strike. I once found myself heckled by an individual far larger than myself, and I am not a small man(6' 3", 185 lbs). He was clearly intoxicated far beyond my own ability to reason with, and he wasn't going to be satisfied with being talked down. So I finished my 32-oz mug of beer, then calmly turned around walloped him in the head with it. He went down, and a brawl was averted.
2. Hard to soft, soft to hard. Never, ever punch anybody in the grille. Jawbones and teeth are far harder and tougher than the skin on your knuckles. Beyond that, the human mouth is full of infectious nastiness just waiting to crawl into your knuckles when you split them open. Use forearm strikes and palm-heel strikes when you attack a face. Save your punches for body shots.
3. GTFO. Don't fight if you don't have to. Leave if neither you nor your close friends are already involved. Scribble some notes if you think you might get called as a witness. When the cops show up in riot gear, they don't care who started it. They are going to tase/pepper spray/arrest pretty much everyone in sight. Make sure you've got your s**t together, and you can probably get your friends out of jail sooner than they probably deserve, while avoiding jail yourself. Take it from an Army Airborne Sapper that even when you don't look for trouble, it has a way of finding you.
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by JonEdanger on -
*Paging Peyton Quinn, Peyton Quinn to the discussion, please*
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Permalink Reply by Spencer Clarkson on -
4. Stay as calm as you can. Anger and a hurt pride can and will disable clear thinking, and if your in that situation you can risk getting injured even more.
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Permalink Reply by Justin on -
5. If you are fighting in a bar, and you are not Staff, and you can remember a set of rules from the Internet, you should not be fighting in the bar.
Barfights feel like Roadhouse to the fighters and usually look more like an episode of The Bad Girls Club to nonparticipants. Until someone is getting shot, or stabbed. It's lose/lose, but since liquor is calling the shots, the best way to avoid them is to pick your drinking venue. If beers are being drunk (dranken?) by the yard and you're not allowed to wear a hat, you should probably keep things under control.
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Permalink Reply by JonEdanger on
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If beers are being drunk (dranken?)
drinked? drinken? dranked?
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Permalink Reply by Michael D. Denny on -
Gentlemen, Gentlemen,, the word you are looking for is ... enjoyed.
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Permalink Reply by Michael D. Denny on
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You're 185 pounds at 6'3" ?
Either I am really really fat, or you are really really thin.
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Permalink Reply by JonEdanger on
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Either I am really really fat, or you are really really thin.
The two are not mutually exclusive.
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Permalink Reply by Carl Monster on -
I'm 6'2" in the high 190s with the delicate frame of an ecto and a low but not nonexistent fat level. If you, sir poster, are as you say you must be ripped/incredibly in shape and my hat is off to you.
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Permalink Reply by Will on -
Take it from an Army Airborne Sapper that even when you don't look for trouble, it has a way of finding you.
Given that I'm nearly 50 and haven't been in a brawl yet, I don't think trouble's a very good hunter of those who don't want to be hunted.
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Permalink Reply by JonEdanger on
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Keep in mind you're trying to use logic with an Army guy.
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