Best lessons from your father
My Dad is an old hard ass electrician. He’s 58 but he carries himself like he’s 80; he has literally worked his life away. I've seen nails through his foot, watched him sever his thumb; make his apprentice cry and pretty much do everything crusty old construction workers are known for. What really makes my balls shrink is his work ethic and tolerance for pain. For years I can remember my Mom taking his shirt and Carhartt off for him because, "My shoulder kinda’ hurts today hun." It was the same routine every day when he got home, for years. When we finally convinced him to go to the doctor, they found a cyst in his shoulder as well as a torn fucking rotator cuff. The cyst in his joint is the same exact thing that put A-Rod on the bench. My old man has been shrugging that shit off at construction sites since before The Fraud was drafted. When I asked him if he was going to take work off for surgery he told me, “College isn’t cheap Kiddo.” How you can you come home with shit grades after that?
Sacrifice for others, the ultimate in manliness.
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Harry William Reineke IV on -
Oh wow. just wow. OMG wow. That's manliness.
I wish I had great lessons from my father, but he died when I was 11, so I came of age without him. I guess the lesson is don't die before your kids come of age....?
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Permalink Reply by thehuhman on -
Bennett, that was an awesome glimpse into your father, and the life he endures. Thanks for posting. You really painted quite a picture! And, yes, that kind of sacrifice is indeed a manly trait!
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Permalink Reply by Michael J. Austin on -
Excellent post Bennett !!!!!!!!!!!!
From my Father ...
-Respect
-Hard work
-Love your family
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Permalink Reply by John on -
Sounds like your father is a real man. Part of being a man is sacrificing, even ignoring yourself for the good of others.
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Permalink Reply by Native Son on -
Your dad is also strictly old-school rancher. I have an uncle who once darned near severed a big toe while chopping out tree roots. He insisted on taking a shower before going to the doctor.
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Permalink Reply by Matt Dera on -
From my father I got the ability to deal with my problems. Whether it is hanging a ceiling fan, rebuilding a flight of steps, fixing a car, roofing the garage, or admitting that I have a problem & dealing with it - I learned from him how to evaluate a situation, take it apart, and put it back together again.
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Permalink Reply by Michael D. Denny on -
I'll never forget when I was 17, I was working for a Gentleman named Rex. Rex came from a very old farming family, a family that had lived in the same area since the day they got off of the boat. Old school southern farmers, through and through. The kind of people who had been at the top of the economic food chain, the bottom, the middle, and back around again, and never once changed who they are. Hard drinkers, hard believers, hard workers. for many generations, right there in the same area.
One afternoon, we needed to stop by Rex's great Uncles house to pick up a part for a combine that he had ordered (his uncle) in order that we could install it for him. (It was an impact bearing for the input drive shaft on an articulated tractor) When we pulled up in the yard, the old Gentleman was standing off to one corner of the yard, with his back turned to us, working on something that he had sitting on a tree stump. When we got up to him, to my shock and horror, it turned out he was sewing up his own arm, with a sewing needle and thread, and was dipping his arm in a bucket of turpentine between stitches. One of his cows had pinned his arm against the barbed wire fence, giving him a very nasty, deep gash running about 6 or so inches down the top of his forearm. And the man was dipping his open wound in turpentine, and sewing it shut himself with his off hand.
He was roughly 70 at the time.
He would also take a kid he hired to mow, along with his riding mower, and make sure all the "wida wemin" (Widowed Women) who lived within 5 or so miles of his home were getting their lawns taken care of.
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Permalink Reply by Alex Romo on -
I haven't really learned anything from my dad apart from riding my bike and all that generic stuff. The bright side of that is that I have been able to be a dad to my brother and in turn, have developed a large notion of tact, self sacrifice, and perseverance. Virtues that have come in handy manifold times. Ultimately, you can say my dad affected such an outcome, for if he were a good father I would not have had the chance to create such a meaningful and mutualy benefiting relationship with my brother. Everything happens for a reason.
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Permalink Reply by David P. Lochner on -
Thanks for that. My pop was kinda the same way. He never complained about anything. Hell. the man had a heart attack and didn't say a word because he thought it was just really bad indigestion. He taught me many things but the few I'm most grateful for are, "Get a job! The only thing that's worse than a mick that doesn't drink is one that doesn't work." "Never let them (women or those who want to step on you in the world) see you cry." "Don't complain! Fight against injustice yes, but don't whine." And my all time favorite, "Don't start a fight ever! But if you get into one do whatever you needs to be done. Fight dirty right off the bat that way you win and can get outta there before the cops come." Aparently my father wasn't a saint, but he did right.
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Permalink Reply by John Carney on
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My old man was a real piece of work, apparently there is a whole generation of micks that think kids will learn better if ya smack 'em around. Yeah that sucks, so whadda ya gonna do about it? I put my self in the company of old dudes I wanted to emulate. It seems to have worked out alright, I'm still young (27) but having learned thus far; never raise your voice or put your hands on women or children, be truthful even if it might jam you up, and learn how to fix things around your own house and car so you don't have to spend your hard earned cabbage on something that a man should know how to fix. So far those couple of rules have steered me alright. Ah yes, and my grandfather had a pearl of wisdom that I use on a daily basis, " If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. If daddy ain't happy don't nobody care." I do my best to keep my gal happy, and it seems to be working. Awesome thread. Enjoy reading about men of the old school. Open wounds in turpentine, that has got to be one of the toughest old men I have ever heard about.
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Permalink Reply by Chris on -
"Ah yes, and my grandfather had a pearl of wisdom that I use on a daily basis, " If momma ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. If daddy ain't happy don't nobody care.""
John,
I cannot tell you how many men I've met and how many men I've counseled that were absolutely miserable in their marriages because of this advice. This is advice that, for me, is best used in moderation and not as a hard-line rule. I do my best to keep my wife happy, but she is aware that happiness in the house is a two way street. (And after 18 years of being together, including a couple of kids, I guess it's working good so far.)
Absolutely agree with your other points, but I did want to point out my experiences with that one.
- Chris
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