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A Gentleman's Duty
Good day, friends.
Allow me to share a small story that happened earlier today. I would like you to share your thoughts on it, and pass along similar situations you have found yourself in.
As a bit of background, a prelude of sorts, it was one of the coldest days of the year to date in my area, with the mercury hovering somewhere in the vicinity of zero even before the effects of wind chill -- a considerable element, given that the wind was supposed to clock up to 30 MPH.
I had just arrived at the college campus I attend, and, as I had come later on in the morning, I was forced to park at the far end of one of the distant lots. I dress relatively formally (slacks, a button-down shirt, a tie, and a vest) and I was wearing my pea coat and knit scarf. Despite this, the best word to describe the conditions would be "bitter."
Another car had parked beside mine, and a young woman got out and began the long trek beside me. I put it kindly when I say she was woefully unprepared for the elements: pink sweat pants, what I assume was a T-shirt, and a thin cotton zip-up hoodie (which was unzipped when she exited the car). By the time we reached the end of the parking lot, she was shivering violently, and there was still a very good distance to go before we reached the safety of the campus quad itself -- and the welcome heat of the buildings!
To be honest, looking at her, I was afraid she'd have hypothermia by the time we finished the trek. I removed my woolen naval surplus coat, and held it out to her. She was shivering too violently to put it on, so I draped it over her shoulders like a cloak and buttoned the front, shouldering her backpack so she could keep her arms inside of the coat.
The rest of the walk was one of the coldest, most savage experiences I have ever had in my life. It burned and seared every bit of exposed flesh, and cut mercilessly through the cotton of my shirt. My vest offered some protection where it covered, being a much sturdier fabric, but I was largely numb by the time we reached the nearest building and she could return my coat to me.
Despite this, I felt good.
Have you had similar things happen? How did you feel about it at the time?
Allow me to share a small story that happened earlier today. I would like you to share your thoughts on it, and pass along similar situations you have found yourself in.
As a bit of background, a prelude of sorts, it was one of the coldest days of the year to date in my area, with the mercury hovering somewhere in the vicinity of zero even before the effects of wind chill -- a considerable element, given that the wind was supposed to clock up to 30 MPH.
I had just arrived at the college campus I attend, and, as I had come later on in the morning, I was forced to park at the far end of one of the distant lots. I dress relatively formally (slacks, a button-down shirt, a tie, and a vest) and I was wearing my pea coat and knit scarf. Despite this, the best word to describe the conditions would be "bitter."
Another car had parked beside mine, and a young woman got out and began the long trek beside me. I put it kindly when I say she was woefully unprepared for the elements: pink sweat pants, what I assume was a T-shirt, and a thin cotton zip-up hoodie (which was unzipped when she exited the car). By the time we reached the end of the parking lot, she was shivering violently, and there was still a very good distance to go before we reached the safety of the campus quad itself -- and the welcome heat of the buildings!
To be honest, looking at her, I was afraid she'd have hypothermia by the time we finished the trek. I removed my woolen naval surplus coat, and held it out to her. She was shivering too violently to put it on, so I draped it over her shoulders like a cloak and buttoned the front, shouldering her backpack so she could keep her arms inside of the coat.
The rest of the walk was one of the coldest, most savage experiences I have ever had in my life. It burned and seared every bit of exposed flesh, and cut mercilessly through the cotton of my shirt. My vest offered some protection where it covered, being a much sturdier fabric, but I was largely numb by the time we reached the nearest building and she could return my coat to me.
Despite this, I felt good.
Have you had similar things happen? How did you feel about it at the time?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Scott Brenner on -
Natural consequences, friend. Some people learn it the first time; some take longer than others; some just never learn...
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Permalink Reply by Mark Nelson on -
Ah, so she was another case of a new poster child arising for "survival of the fittest" campaign?
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Permalink Reply by Clayton L on -
Great job Mark! I have no doubt your chivalry made a great (positive) impact on the young lady, and showed her there are still some gentlemen left. I hope others saw your actions, and will feel compelled to act in a similar matter when opportunities present themselves.
I continually try to help others in any way possible, particularly ladies and people with children. My actions range from opening doors, helping lift heavy items in stores (or into cars, etc. I can't think of anything I've done that matches the sacrifice you made, though. I believe after a while acting in such a manner becomes habit, and doesn't seem out of place. The world would be much better off if more people acted as you did. Again, nice work.
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Permalink Reply by Mark Nelson on
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I appreciate your kind words, sir!
I think there are more gentleman left then people might think, although there may be a bit of a dearth of them in my generation. I can't say that I'm a religious man, but I do think that by helping others, we really do help ourselves.
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Permalink Reply by Jim on -
Mark,
Good for you! The world is a better place when we watch out for others.
My 2 friends and I went on a trip to CA when we graduated from High School. On the long drive back to ID we took turns seeing who could go the fastest. This might sound dangerous but I had the record of about 78 mph on a long straight down hill (I drove an old Honda wagon). On the way down the long hill I spotted a car stalled on the side of the road. Outside of the car were 2 ladies and 3 little kids.
I pulled over, backed up and helped them get their stalled car going. They were afraid that the car would stall again so I drove the car about an hour into town as my buddies followed. It turned out 1 of the ladies was a girl I had gone to HS with and the other was her sister and children.
The story has a great ending as I married the girl that I went to HS with. It has been a great 22 years!
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Permalink Reply by Mark Nelson on
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Thank you!
Isn't it amazing how these things work out? Fantastic! Being stuck on the side of the road has always been one of my worst nightmares, ever since all the electronics in my old Plymouth Horizon shorted out one day. Thinking back on it, it was a gentleman much like yourself and the others here who got me out of that mess -- he pushed my disabled car with his to the nearest service station.
Congratulations on 22 years! May there be many more.
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Permalink Reply by John on -
It's good to see that you did the right thing just because it was the right thing to do. That's how a real gentleman acts.
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Permalink Reply by Mark Nelson on
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Thank you. I think I've got a long way to go before I can count myself amongst the august company of gentlemen, but as I said with the subject line of the post -- what is a gentleman's duty if not to help those around him?
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Permalink Reply by Kultron Vesuvius on -
Hovering around 0... so -17 C. That's pretty much how cold it is every day here for 3 months. it seems this site has turned into a bragging place for men to talk about their various deeds (though very slyly turned into a question thread at the end of the post). What you should have done is explained to the girl the principles of body temperature and how physical movement is key to prevent hypothermia. The woman was probably already freezing from sitting still in her car on the way to the journey, so that only made it worse. Even more amusing is how you say you were wearing a naval surplus coat (which aren't designed for winter). Sounds to me like neither of you were properly dressed for winter.
Sorry if this sounds insulting, I just thought this post amusing to me, living in Canada, dealing with much more 'savage' temperatures daily and as well seeing people like this not know what they're doing when it comes to cold weather. Try walking in a -50C/-58F in the arctic air and when your nose mucus freezes before you can even think your full name.
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Permalink Reply by Mark Nelson on
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Certainly, sir. I'm glad you decided to post this. You're more than entitled to your viewpoint, although, in all actuality, your points could just as easily be applied to your own post here.
Allow me to begin by pointing out that I spent much of my earlier life (up until age 18) in Wisconsin -- a place that is often compared to Siberia, given its range of temperature extremes. I am fully aware of, and understand, the mechanics of cold on the human body. In Wisconsin, if you do not understand these principles, you die on the way to the mailbox and are found during the spring thaw.
A few of your statements may be based on inaccurate preconceptions. Vehicles here are equipped with heating elements. Around here, we generally start the vehicle several minutes before we get in to travel. This allows the vehicle's cabin to be warm for our comfort, and also serves to let the engine block reach its operating temperature, thus saving wear and tear on various parts of the car such as the transmission. While she may not have done this, I doubt she was freezing in her vehicle, or she would not have had her light jacket unzipped when she first exited it.
I certainly could have done as you suggested, and given the woman a lecture on the cold. If I was lucky, she would have kept walking and ignored me. If I was unlucky, I would have been slapped, called heartless, and been reproached by my peers. I can only assume the coat that I was wearing, in conjunction with a scarf, gloves, and a woolen hat, was naval surplus. It was a gift. What I do know is that it is made of a thick, very heavy wool, cut in the style of a naval overcoat, and that it is lined. It is quite warm, and certainly capable of stopping the wind. Besides, given her parting words to me of thanks, I'm quite sure she had come to an understanding of the effect of the cold on her own.
I will certainly not attempt to hide the fact that I am proud of my actions in helping the woman, but I would defend myself from any accusation that I had no other motive than that in posting this here. As I said in both the beginning and end of my post, I would enjoy to hear any stories you, and others, have regarding situations like this.
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Permalink Reply by Jeff Kraykovic on -
I think you set a fine example of how a man should act in that situation.
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